All posts by hopeservicefellowship

SUPER HEROES? A stockbroker and physician.

Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob Smith, MD are my Super Heroes. No, they are not the fantasy figurines so popular these days with our children and grandchildren. Nor are they  the plastic bobbleheads we find in the toy stores.

Bill Wilson, was a Wall Street  stockbroker who since his sobriety day, began to  make investments in peoples lives that had become shattered by alcohol.    Dr. Bob Smith, hearing Bill’s story,  joined him. Bob was  a physician who himself personally   saw the ravages that alcohol did to other human beings, including himself and family.

Together, these two men brought men and women together  as mutual partners in helping to keep each other sober, by what was to be called the Alcoholics Anonymous program of recovery. It was this mutual aid for other alcoholics who were  till suffering  from addiction to alcohol who heard Bill and Bob’s stories of recovery, plus the many other recovering alcoholics  and  who made their stories their own.

Our one-time stockbroker and physician  have given us all, and thousands more around the world, a story about struggle,  where one recovering addict, who by  sharing their own story of recovery, give strength,  hope, sobriety to another human being, one at a time.

“To share your story is to save your life.”

Become a Super Hero your self. Share your story.  Join with Bill W., and Dr. Bob S.,  and become the hero others are looking to for help.

Hugh

Anxiety and the four simple rules for recovery

–the cure for physical symptoms of anxiety–

Four simple rules

FACE:  Do not run away

ACCEPT: Do not fight/floating

FLOAT PAST:  Do not stop/pause and listen in

LET TIME PASS:  Do not be impatient with time

For example, the nervously ill person usually  notices each new symptom in alarm, listens in  apprehension, and yet at the same time is afraid to examine it too closely for fear this will make it worse. So he/she agitatedly seeks occupation to try to force forgetfulness.

This is running away, not focusing

He may try to cope with the unwelcome feeling by tensing himself against them, thinking, “I must not let this get the better of me.”

He is fighting, not accepting and floating.

He is listening in, noticing each new symptom with alarm

He also keeps looking backward and worrying because so much time has passed and he is not cured -and if there is an evil spirit that could be exorcised if only he or the doctor knew how to do it.

He is impatient with time, is not willing to let time pass.”

Check in tomorrow for a more account of how this all works, especially whilre learning more about the First fear and the Second fear.

 

The two works which have helped me most of my life in recovery are these two books  written by Dr. Clair Weekes:

Hope and Help for your Nerves

Peace from Nervous Suffering.

 

..we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life

Promise #4: We comprehend the word serenity and we know peace of mind.

Agitation, anxiety and jitteriness were all part of my life as I muddled through day after day, one foot in front of the other.  Serenity was definitely not a part of my life.

As with any attachment to a negative behavior, serenity and peace was the farthest thing from my life. The new beliefs and thoughts which I heard expressed at Depressed Anonymous meetings started to help me change the way I thought about myself, my world and my future.

I believe that it takes work, time and prayer and quiet periods of meditation to achieve the peace and serenity that we are talking about here.

  PEACE OF MIND IS THE RESULT OF:

  1. A clear conscience
  2. Living in the present
  3. Gratitude everyday
  4. Belief that the God of my understanding will get me through the problems of my life
  5. Forgiveness of myself and amends to all person I have harmed
  6. Doing God’s will means letting go

I am firmly convinced that in order to continue any semblance of peace and serenity I will have to structure a daily quiet period into my life. This is an essential part of the prescription for getting well and staying well. Also, I believe that when I am quiet, God can give to me all that is mine to have. My will and my life  have to be attuned to God’s presence and love.  We will know that in order for God to make itself present to us and demonstrate its love we have to sit still, be quiet and listen with purity of heart. This is an essential part of the formula where we will find our sobriety and serenity.

It is my belief that God does speak to those who remain quiet and have a design to listen. Peace is defined as “an undisturbed state of mind, absence of mental conflict.”   Serenity is defined as “a quality or state of being serene; calmness, tranquility.”

The quality or state of being serene all takes time, work and discipline. I believe that  the big book of AA says it best: ” When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts   of remarkable things followed.  We had a new employer; being all powerful he provided what we needed, if we kept close to him and performed his work well.

Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in plans, our little designs  and ourselves.  More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of his presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or hereafter.. We’re reborn.” ( Page 63, AA).

————-

SOURCE: Copyright(c) I’ll do it when I feel better. (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Pages 36-38. The Promises of Depressed Anonymous.

 

We believe that no one can love us…

We come to believe that if we do consider ourselves bad and worthless, we just know that no one can really love us or accept us. We just know the more we look at ourselves and our few remaining relationships, that we really aren’t accepted – people just put up with us.

“…There is  one great advantage about seeing yourself as helpless and in the power of others. You don’t have to be responsible for yourself. Other people make all the decisions and when things turn out badly you can blame other people. And things always turn out badly. You know this. That’s why you always expect the worst.” Dorothy Rowe.

Responsibility is the name of the game in recovery and it is here that we need to focus our attention.  As we get into discussion with other people who are depressed, much like ourselves, we see that they talk abut feeling better while at the same time acting on their own behalf. These people who are doing better are also talking about taking charge of their lives and doing things for themselves. In fact, at Depressed Anonymous meetings, the recovery people often delight at how assertive they are becoming now that they have gained a sense of mastery over their lives. They are also committed to their own recovery. People who want to change begin to swallow their pride and ask for help.  They get in touch with their feelings and feel!  This is truth and this is getting in touch with one’s best self. ”


SOURCE: Copyright(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011)  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Page 91.

The meaning of Depression seen from the perspective of Judaism

THE JEWISH VISION

As an ongoing examination of major world religions, our  first being Buddhism, we would like now to focus on  Judaism’s perspective on the subject of depression.

Abramo  Alberto  Piattelli tells us  in his paper presented at the world conference on depression,  that he would like to refer to cases of depression that are to be found within the Jewish community and try to identify its causes and focus on the contribution that Judaism can offer to a solution to this problem in the light of millennia- old tradition.

From an examination of the condition of a depressed person, what most provokes anxiety and interest is to see that in such a person every vital dynamism is suppressed and this is translated into a strong diminution in that person’s interests and initiatives.; indeed, to the point of reducing the activity of the subject to a state of complete inhibition.

In a society in which individualism is exalted and relationships between people are limited, every individual runs the risk of being alienated and isolated by society.

From a theological point of view, the human community works against the loneliness of man and the loneliness of God. Thus it is that a Midrash states ‘since the first day of creation the Holy One, may He be blessed, has wanted to enter into communion with the terrestrial world and live amidst the creation together with His creatures.’

“…the whole of Jewish practice is constructed in such a way that the individual finds his proper role in that community.”

“…society as a whole cannot ignore the condition of the individual human being but must, rather, see him  as an integral part of itself.”

“…what Rabbi J.D. Soloveitchik defines as the ‘community of prayer’   he means a community united in shared pain, in shared suffering, and also in shared joy. According to the Jewish tradition, the language of prayer must always be in the plural so that the praying person always associated his own neighbor with the supplications that are expressed. Individual prayers, that is to say those expressed at times of illness, mourning or other critical moments, must also be expressed in the plural.

“…the whole community takes upon itself the suffering of another person and works for his reconnection with the community.”

The correlation that exists between the individual and society, and the obligations that derive from this correlation, are the foundation of the whole of Judaism.

During our time, in which the most evident symptom of depression lies in the marginalization of the individual and his non-relevance within society, the Jewish tradition emphasizes the value of the participation of the individual  in the life of the community, precisely because in this context man is called by his destiny to manifest all his dignity. The concern of the community in relation to the individual who suffers from depression involves freeing this person from worry, paralysis and  desperation.” Pages 106-107. THE JEWISH VISION.

Another good antidote for a person suffering from depression.

Continuing with our discussion of world religions  and  proposed antidotes for depression today we will again focus on Buddhism. This is the second in a series.

“Buddhist teachings provide very good antidote for people suffering from depression. “Morita Therapy”  is a well known example of applying Buddhism,  especially Zen Buddhism, to psychotherapy. Morita Therapy  is a therapeutic technique developed by the Japanese Psychologist Shoma Morita (1874-1938).

One of the main concepts  of Morita psychotherapy is the following:

Desire for life, according to Morita, the basic force of human being is the strong desire for life. The converse of this is the  fear of death, both being aspects of the same force. The efforts of human beings  to lead a fulfilled life are all manifestations of the desire for life. At the same time a manifestation of desire for life is the tendency to fear curtailments and threat’s to one’s well being; Morita calls this tendency “hypochrondical   basic tone”.  This tendency is common to all human beings, but in introverted and very sensitive persons, this can be a starting point of a process which finally ends in depression and neurosis.

Psychic interaction: if attention is paid to some sensation, the sensation becomes very sharp, and by mutual interaction of sensation and attention, the sensation will become more and more excessive. This is kind of vicious circle which grows out of being prepossessed with one’s over sensitiveness, for example, sad feelings, hopelessness, fear, distraction, insomnia and so on.

Self: suggestion: self suggestion helps to fix a problem in the form of a symptom through formation of a conviction that, for example, blushing is abnormal, and endless repetition of this conviction, so that rational reflection is excluded. This free-floating attention, a main characteristic of health and productive person, is lost, and attention is always fixed on the same ideas.

Contradiction of thought: sensations and feelings are an integral part of human life; they arise, reach their climax and vanish. The inclination to contrast a present feeling or sensation with the ideal state, and trying hard to realize this ideal state instead of pursuing the task at hand, is called contradiction of thought by Morita. Contradiction  of thought, aided by self-suggestion, works together in the formation of neurosis and depression.

To be as one is: “this means that if he feels depressed, he accepts his feeling of depression. If he feels anxious, he accepts the feelings of anxiety. Rather than direct his attention to his feeling state, he instead directs his efforts toward living his life well.”


SOURCE:  The Proceedings of the  XVIII International Conference, organized by the Pontifical Council for Health pastoral Care. DEPRESSION, (2003) Pages 113-119. The Perspective of Buddhism.

Living in the security of my hope

I am choosing to live in the security of my hope rather than in the fear of life’s possible pain.

“…Haven’t our sadness and thoughts of unworthiness been our last refuge from having to face ourselves, take charge and accept responsibility for our own lives? For many, just knowing that that they might have a choice and be able to choose to feel differently can be a startling revelation.  I can choose to be happy or I can choose to stay feeling miserable.”

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

Life is one that provides me with many areas of choice. I can choose to live with the uncertainty of hope or I can stay mired in the despair of having to always have everything predictable. The latter is the hell of my depression.


SOURCE:    Copyright(c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 step fellowship groups.  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Buddhism, and the mind as the druken monkey.

Mind as drunken monkey? Let’s  explain. In a talk delivered at the Proceedings of the 18th International Conference on Depression (2003) in Rome, the Perspective  of Buddhism and depression  was delivered by Raymond R.M. Tai, with the help from Ven.Prof. Heng-ching Shih, a Buddhist nun, whose paper Tai  delivered at this important conference.

The following are some thoughts on Buddhism and depression as presented by  Dr. Heng-ching Shih in her paper.

“In concentration meditation, we focus on a single object such as the breath, a mantra, or a  zen  koan, with wholehearted attentiveness. It is the cultivation of self-control of attention through control of the mind. In Buddhism, the mind is often described as a drunken monkey running wildly within six windows. Five of the windows correspond to sensory impressions from our five senses and the sixth window correspond to our mental sense of internally generated impressions including thought and memories. For most people the monkey runs from window to window out of control. Through concentration practices, the meditator learns to control the monkey and keep consciousness focused on some meditation object.

One of the most well known, popular and practical examples of concentration meditation is called “the mindfulness of in and out breathing.” We breathe in and out all day and night, yet we are hardly mindful of it. In order to meditate, we sit physically  still in an upright position to receive the immediate flow of moment to moment experience, attending to the breathing process, silently noting the inhalation and exhalation at the nostrils and abdomen. The effort is not to control breathing but to be attentive to it.

At the beginning it is difficult to pay attention to our breathing for even a few consecutive seconds. The more we attempt to pay attention to it, the more we become distracted. Memories, daydreams and anxieties arise. There is an apparently endless flood of thoughts,  feelings and fantasies. One of these usually catches our attention and we become  oblivious to the present moment.

As soon as we notice that our attention has wandered,  we should resume our attention to breath. Like a child who reaches for one toy, becomes bored, and reaches for another, and then another, our mind keeps jumping from one thought, feeling or fantasy to another. Interestingly, by noticing that we  have been inattentive we slowly cultivate increased attentiveness and focus.

After a certain period of practice, we may experience for just a split second that our mind is fully concentrated on our breathing, when we will not hear even sounds nearby, when no external world exists. This slight moment is a tremendous experience, full of joy, happiness and tranquility.

The experience of mindfulness of breathing, which is one of the simplest and easiest practices, can be applied to every action of daily life. People do not generally  like their present actions.  They live in the past or in the future. This is especially true with depressed patients.  Though they  seem to be doing something now, they live somewhere else in their thought, in their imaginary problems and worries, usually in the memories of the past or in desires  and speculations about the future.

The Vietnamese Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh gives the following instruction of practicing mindfulness: while washing the dishes, you might be thinking about the tea afterwards, and so try get them out of the way quickly as possible in order to drink the tea. But that means that you are incapable of living during the time you are washing dishes. When you are washing the dishes, washing the dishes must be the most important thing in your life. Just as when you are drinking  tea, drinking tea must be the most important thing in your life.”

(Page 116, Tai).

More about the Drunken Monkey tomorrow. Also, insights into Morita Therapy.