“We have emphasized  willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things  which we have admitted are objectionable? Can God  take them all –every one? Do  we still cling to something of which we will not let go. We ask God to help us to be willing. When ready we say something like this: “My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad.  I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen!”

  We know that our willpower alone can’t get us out of this prison of depression, but only a belief in a force or power greater than ourselves. So by working Step Six ( “We’re entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character),  we continue to be in God’s will and let God help us discover and root out those defects of character that keep us prisoner.

‘So many people choose the predictableness of misery to the risky feeling of being unsure and scared over the new and faint feelings of lightness and cheer. As the depressed person gradually begins to knock down the wall of his/her denial that he/she is addicted to sadness whenever life gets stressful, this is in itself is  the starting point in the recovery process…”

The Depressed Anonymous Workbook. Page 55.

  Lack of power that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live and it had to be  a Power greater than ourselves.”

RESOURCES

(c)Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. Page 65.

(c) The Depressed Anonymous Workbook. (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville,  KY.

“it seemed that I was living in another world until one of my parents gave me a phone number of Depressed Anonymous. The Depressed Anonymous meetings plus reading the Depressed Anonymous manual have provided me with the tools to live without being depressed.  Most important of all, the Twelve Steps mentioned in the book have made me understand that God (my Higher Power)  will give me strength to deal with my depression and got me on with my life and be happy with myself.

The book with its Twelve Steps, has taught me that I am not alone. And that I am not  the only one who is suffering from depression. It has taught me to believe more in my Higher Power and let it handle my depression.”

It absolutely  feels that we are living in another world when depression takes over our lives. We believed the our  immediate reality of  this fog that takes over our mind  is the only reality that we can ever know. It’s  like driving with one’s  car lights  on low beam. What lies ahead is hidden. Our driving becomes cautious until we are forced to stop. We are hesitant to move further. Fear and anxiety grip our every thought. What danger can lie ahead?  We believe there is no escape.

For me, this is my best analogy for  my own depression. I too, like the author of the above sentiment (see Depressed Anonymous manual /Personal Stories) who felt completely alone and helpless.

But that is not the end  of our stories. Our feeling alone, adrift and living in constant fear comes to an end.  By learning about the fellowship of a mutual-aid group that we call  Depressed Anonymous and becoming an active member   I found new ways to live with hope. 

“As these new tools have helped me and will continue  to help all those many others who are looking for help out of their own fog.  They have taught me not to dwell on my past, to live one day at a time, and to look forward to the future, but  not live there.  It will take me a long  time to deal with depression, but I’m glad that these tools are available. Life can be good for a change. Please don’t give up.”

You are not alone.  I am not alone. Those who have shared their own stories of recovery in the Depressed Anonymous manual, (quoted here) all have the same story; I was depressed and now I am not. If you would like to know more about these persons who have shared their stories of hope and serenity, please check out  their stories of how they used the tools of recovery to live again with  hope.  They know that they do not  have to feel alone again. 

Besides the groups, there are those who may want  to use the Home Study Recovery Program kit, comprised of the Depressed Anonymous Manual  and The Depressed Anonymous Workbook.

These two books, written by those who were depressed and  now have  made these useful tools available  for others like themselves. Recovery means that we  can now   gain critical self knowledge   plus continuing to be  motivated  to devote  personal time and study for our own recovery.

RESOURCES

(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.Ky. 

(c) The Depressed Anonymous Workbook, 2nd edition  (2002)  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, Ky. 

Sometimes persons tell us that they get sad for no reason at all. All of a sudden they just feel down and don’t know why. Many times after reflecting upon this sudden rush of sadness, they realize that it has come from somewhere and they might as well take responsibility for it and deal with it. One of the best ways to deal with a feeling, especially the unpleasant ones, is to stay with it, and see what it is trying to say to you. When we run from it we lose. Granted, this won’t be easy and you might not find the source of the sudden sadness at first glance, but in time you can feel it and deal with it and then discard it. The more you ruminate about how sad you are and then how bad you are for feeling so sad, the more you have begun the downward spiral into physically feeling weak and hopeless. This is the time to call a friend or member of the Depressed Anonymous group. Just say: “Hey, I’m feeling sad and here is the reason why I am feeling sad – what do you think?” More times than not, your sad feelings will melt away.

Low moods, if not faced promptly can sometimes spiral into deeper moods, filling us with a sadness that slowly paralyzes our thinking and immobilizes our motivation to perform the most simplest of activities. These low moods carve out a beachhead in our psyche and have their own destructive way with our thoughts and behavior.

In my own case, I would be thinking of nothing in particular when suddenly, like a wave washing over me, I would be drowning in the darkness of these feelings, unaware of their source or able to predict their duration. Seeking relief I would escape to taking to my bed and sleeping.

These feelings, as unpredictable as they are, come from somewhere. Just like the rain, the snow and wind, they all come from somewhere. In truth, there is no mystery here as there source is contained in feelings connected to an event in our recent life and more probably have their origin in an earlier period of our lives.

There is truth that our body remembers situations from the past that we have not consciously thought about in years. It’s much like the deja vu experiences we have while at a certain place or life situation and it feels like we have been there before. We might think that we have been there – done that

A client once shared with me how he always felt sad when the cold winter season rolled around and he would become begin to feel sad and alone. As he told his story of growing up he mentioned how every February his mother would hole up in her bedroom and tell them “I am sick. I am afraid I am going to die.” Resultant from this personal experience of his fear that his mother was dying, every February or around that same time, his body would connect him with the sadness and fear felt when he was a child alone with his own fears, and would repeat in his body the same fears he had felt then. It wasn’t about the cold of winter but it was about those sad feelings coming to life at this particular season of his life. The body might remember everything while the mind and feelings remain submerged and hidden. Like a plant which bloom year after year.

In The Depressed Anonymous Workbook we read how early childhood memories connected to our deepest feelings can resurface as we gain adulthood. Because of a painful and meaningful loss of a loved one that was never discussed or talked about as we grew up, the feelings continue to remain and fester, like a wound that doesn’t heal.

Is there someone who was close to you as a child who died but whom you did not grieve or shed a tear for because you were still too young to say that you missed their love and their presence. All of a sudden they were gone and you got on with your life, but your body remembered that this person was once a meaningful part of your life. This might take some investigative work on your part, but we would well to talk to family and friends and see if there were deaths around the time that you were growing up and which you are now unaware, but might have effected your parents or guardians perceptions of life and so affected you.

To discover more effective ways to handle and deal with our feelings, please consider these two books written and published by members of the Depressed Anonymous Fellowship. Click onto The Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore for more details on ordering online.

These books can be a great source of help in dis-mantling our own depression and providing the tools to get our lives back on track. Please click onto www.depressedanon.com for more detailed information on ways to find the help you are seeking.

Sources:

1. Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition, © 2011, Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville KY. Step 10 – Page 90.
2. The Depressed Anonymous Workbook, © 2001, Depressed Anonymous Workbook. Louisville, KY. Page 75. Step 10.1

Today, Mary,  a member of the Depressed Anonymous fellowship shares some of her  personal thoughts about  her  recovery.  In one of the personal  stories from Depressed Anonymous (2011)  she  shares  

         “Today I can experience hope. I will believe I can live this day with pleasant thoughts. I will do one activity that will give me hope and light for today.”

  Mary continues to make her  remarkable recovery by  being part of a fellowship where all members have an opportunity for learning  how to use  the tools which will  deliver them from the pain and isolation of their depression.

     She continues  to tell us that “today I will not dwell on the past and the losses that have occurred.”

Of the many areas of her life that she   reflects on in her story, she shares   that instead of thinking about the past and the harm that her losses   have cost her personally, she now examines the possibilities which  her new program of hope is providing   for healing and a  new way of looking at life and her role in it. 

In the Depressed Anonymous fellowship Mary is learning to accept the fact that she doesn’t have to stay depressed. Now, today, her group is encouraging her to be part of a hopeful journey shared by all its members. One of its main messages is to live one day at a time; to live with the belief that   as other members of the group tell their stories of how they escaped the trauma and pain of depression, so too can she.  It is a fact that by following and incorporating the Twelve Spiritual principles  of the Steps in her own life — this is what has brought her to the point of recovery for herself and many others.

Mary now has a plan that works. She wants to tell others about how she has been willing,  open and honest about having that great need to believe in something so much  bigger than herself or her depression. She has had a spiritual   awakening,  releasing  in her a new peace and a new purpose,  not only for her own recovery but for those many others like herself who are seeking a solution,  focused on a new depression-free way to live.

She now believes that living out the 12 Steps of Depressed Anonymous in her own life is what has brought her to this place of freedom from fear and despair.

RESOURCE

For more information on Depressed Anonymous and the Twelve Steps please click onto depressedanon.com and learn more about the program that has given Mary life. You can also order online.

(c)  Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. Personal Stories. Pgs.134-135.

When I gradually found myself in a mental and physical lockdown, due to a battle with depression, I did what most of us with the symptoms of depression do, I began to isolate. If not physically, at least in my mind.

For those of us who have experienced a root canal, you know what I am speaking of when it comes to suffering pain. Maybe today, the root canal of yesterday is not as bad today because of  advancement in this dental procedure.  But with my own depression I felt a terrible pain and total physical exhaustion.  I just wanted to be left alone. I needed to try and figure out what began as a worry turned into being a  continued ruminating about my own mental abilities.  Because I couldn’t just ask my dentist to drill down and remove the cause of my pain, I chose to hobble away quietly and  begin  to medicate it with sleep and avoidance of everything that I had held dear in my life. I was not dealing with a decaying tooth but with a powerful  mental anguish, sapping me of any positive solution to a life gone sour.

And just as a dental procedure provides a solution  for my tooth, so is there a solution for  finding healing and help for my depression.  I believe that for most people who suffer from depression there is  hope. There is a healing that is available. For many persons their depression lifts of it ‘s own. It’s been said that 85%   of us who have had only one episode of depression in our lives that  this will be the only one we will experience. 

Many seek out medication, some  therapists, some psychologists, and  most a combination of these resources.  But for those who also seek out understanding and who can  find a friend to talk with, these are the ones that gradually find hope and a solution for their misery.

In my own life, I found a group of men and women (  Depressed Anonymous) , of all ages who come together and speak about their isolation   and helplessness and find others   in the same boat  as themselves. It became clear that this is a positive experience and a resource that gradually gave me an anchor to help me survive the storm.  No longer did I feel that the waves of sadness and feeling hopeless would drown me.  It also provided me with a group of people, coming together as a group,  continuing  to provide me with  tools to leave my self constructed prison of depression. Now I am free of living always inside my mind and beating myself up with guilt and shame.

Take charge of your life, piece by piece. Take one small goal at a time. Get busy. Walk everyday. Go to gym. Find that friend to talk with-especially good if they belong to a Depressed Anonymous group and they use a plan  that provides a pathway to hope and help.  Get  a DA Workbook and DA Manual (3rd edition) and follow it’s plan, one day at a time. Learn about the 12 spiritual principles/Steps  of Depressed Anonymous and apply them to your own life.  If you do these simple steps, you will find that just as going to a dentist for help with  your teeth, so will getting involved with people like ourselves provide healing and  focus on taking good care of ourself and our  life without the debilitating pain of depression. That is a Promise!

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RESOURCES

(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.

(c) The Depressed Anonymous Workbook (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.