Category Archives: Depressed Anonymous

DEPRESSIVOS ANONIMOS (Spanish edition) PUBLISHED TODAY(MAY 1).

Today, Depressed Anonymous Publications has published the First Spanish Edition of DEPRESSIVOS ANONIMOS.   (This Spanish edition   is  the English  edition of Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition).

This Spanish edition provides the 12 Step fellowship with a Step by Step program of recovery.

See our website at www.Depressedanon.com for information on ordering online.

DEPRESSIVOS ANONIMOS  can be ordered from Amazon.com and/ or from the Depressed Anonymous website at www. depressedanon.com.

For more information  email at  depanon@netpenny.net.

How soon and how quick can I be free from the pain and isolation of depression?

Recently someone wanted to know “how quick could they be free from the pain and isolation of their depression?” How soon can they get back on the playing field of life? It was like, how can I hurry this mess up in my life, and get going full steam ahead. They wanted to feel the way did before they got knocked down by those feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. Well, I guess they thought it would be like going to the doctor and asking how long this flu or cold would last? Normally, that would be a fair-enough question to ask. We all have asked it. We have all asked it because we were sick and tired of being sick and tired. We wanted relief. The jitteriness and hollow feelings which depression was causing was just too much to live with.

But as we all know this question can only be answered with time and the frequent and active participation in the fellowship of the group. It is by reading the texts of the Depressed Anonymous manual and attempting to put these principles into daily effect in one’s life. Also, one can begin to feel some improvement in their lives as they slowly gain a belief, a faith if you will, that they too can get better. If others can do it “I can as well” they tell themselves. Yes, this will be their truth.

With time, patience and sharing they begin to accept themselves for who they are and change what they don’t like in themselves. By the fact that one comes to a meeting is in itself half of the battle in overcoming one’s depression. It is this interminable isolation that keeps the depression at its height and intensity. It is only when a person can admit that their life is out of control and begin to trust the group with their story: a painful journey describing how they got to the point where they are today – isolated, anxious and hurting. Much like a full-body toothache.

The program is a very simple one-but this doesn’t mean that it is easy. All change is painful and if we are to grow we have to change. We have to resolve some of these old issues that keep popping up in our lives. They want our attention but we continue to cram then back in place and don’t want to took at them. But the only way to get free from these feelings of painful despair is to face these feelings, as difficult as they are, and move along with one personal change after another. We start by making choices which benefit our new feelings of hope and serenity.

The first step in getting past our depression is to first get into the door of a Depressed Anonymous meeting. And if you don’t have a Depressed Anonymous meeting in your town then you can find literature at our website (www.depressedanon.com). This will be a great start in gradually chipping away at our fears, our pain and debilitating isolation. There is no quick fix. All good growth is gradual – even with medication it still takes time to tell if the medication is working for you.

In the meantime, check out articles on our website where you will find articles talking about what you are feeling now and with a promise that you too will feel better.

Hugh

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition(2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.

Click onto the VISIT OUR STORE and go to Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore to see what literature is available. You can order online.

Lack of power, that was our dilemma

The following excerpts are quotations from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous. Because our Depressed Anonymous fellowship was modeled on the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Step spiritual principles for recovery, It is appropriate for us to utilize and put into practice in our daily lives what has been proven to work for those who are part of the 12 Step fellowship recovery programs. Depressed Anonymous is one of those programs.

Lack of power, that was our dilemma (yes-no?). We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But when and how were we to find this power? Well, that’s exactly what this book (A.A. .45) is about. It’s main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.

…deep down in every man, woman and child, is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstration of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself. We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much a fact as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the great reality deep within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. It was so with us. We can only clean the ground a bit. If our testimony helps sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourage you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail. The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you (AA.p. 55). Some of us grow into it more slowly. But He has come to all who have honestly sought Hm. When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us.” (AAp.71).

Step 2 Instruction

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question: Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe that there is a Power greater than myself?” (yes-no?) As soon as a person can say that they do believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure them that they are on their way. It has been repeatedly proven among us this simple cornerstone that a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. (A.A 47)

If you answered yes, congratulations, you have taken step two and we emphatically assure you are now on your way! ”

SOURCE: http://w.w.w.big booksponsorship.org.


“At each Depressed Anonymous meeting we hear different members of the group tell how the Higher Power helped return them to a peace, a serenity that they had never experienced until they started coming to Depressed Anonymous and began working on themselves. Now they can spend time in prayer and meditation with the Higher Power guiding their lives through the times of darkness. In time they have found giving up their depression to the care of the Higher Power almost a pleasure. It is our belief that if we want to begin to live, we must surrender our addiction to depression. The more we are tempted to seek comfort and bash ourselves with thoughts of how bad we are, the more depressed we become. But on the positive side, the more we begin to take mastery over our thinking and our listless behavior, the smaller, gradual gains we will make in seeing some light at the end of the tunnel by living just for today, that is, one day at a time, and not in the hurts and the anger of yesterday or the fear and anxiety of tomorrow, we will begin to see a spark of light coming over the horizon” (D.A.p.41).

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.KY

Is there an alternative?

Jonathon Rottenberg in his work, The Depths: The evolutionary origins of the Depression Epidemic tells us that

“The mood system has a bias to return to deep depression even with little provocation. Fortunately relapse is not inevitable and it can be countered. Antidepressant medication is currently the domionant strategy for buffering a person’s risk of relapse. Using antidepressants as the first line of defense is consistent with  defect  models, such as the biological model of kindled depression. In line with the idea that drugs address a permanent viability, psychiatrists  often recommend a life time  of antidepressant maintenance treatment for people who have previously experienced three or more episodes.”

This same author goes on to share how antidepressants aren’t the only  proven means for  slowing down or preventing depression. In this section of his book he goes on to explain how other treatments such as cognitive therapy and    mindfulness-based  cognitive therapy provide alternate care . He explains how “the success of brief, psychologically based treatments is encouraging not only because the treatment works, but because it speaks against  the existence of a permanently  brain-based vulnerability to depression.”

With all that has been said here, I would like to add another reality and alternative  for treatment of depression.  Simply put, the treatment occurs in the  midst of those persons depressed who share their struggles with each other. They are no longer alone, shamed and existing on the margins of those  who are  needing understanding  and  support. The group not only can provide moral and physical support, they can be buoyed by a spiritual l belief  that a God  of their understanding,  a Higher Power,  is  guiding  them on the path of their own  recovery. They not only have other members of the group walking the same path as  are they, but this support is buttressed by having a  personal plan of action.

For those of us who are  active members of Depressed Anonymous, we know first hand how our Twelve Step plan of action provides us all with a way out of depression. Whether we happen to be on antidepressants, in a therapy program,  or other forms of help, we discover that being in the midst of a group of person like ourselves, and receiving mutual aid for our own individual pain, it makes it possible to be positive about  our recovery. We are not alone. We now have the tools and we have each other. As we all are so much aware, it is the being dis-connected from life and others that makes our life hell. For most of us,  it is in the being dis-connected that drives us deeper into isolation  and personal despair.

If you the reader are depressed, and you are visiting with your doctor, ask her if she has a depression support group that she might refer you to. You can tell her that it makes sense to talk with someone who has been were you are now. It takes one to know one!

As a therapist, it was always my practice to refer clients to a  Depressed Anonymous group. Those who kept coming back to meetings had a plan in hand that was not only providing hope but the tools for living outside  the prison of  depression.  We need health professionals to be able to provide their patients with other mental health opportunities as alternatives to traditional approaches to depression or in conjunction with them.

Have a hopeful day.

Hugh

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville KY.

Go to The Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore,  at VISIT THE STORE for this and other helpful books  on depression. You can order material online

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I want to start a Depressed Anonymous group in my community? How do I do that?

This month (12/2018) we have had four requests to start a Depressed Anonymous group in their particular locations. Three were requests from individuals living in the US and one was from a person from Canada.

Our first inclination would to advise them to go to our Newsletter Archives at our Home Page Menu and read the issues from #1- through and including the Newsletter for 2018. Each of the Newsletters has a section about our program of recovery as well as other important information about overcoming depression. Each is titled “How to Start A Depressed Anonymous group.”

Since all of our Groups worldwide use the Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition Manual, it serves as an excellent guide for each of the newly formed Depressed Anonymous group membership and part of their ongoing program of recovery. There is a chapter in this Manual for the Leader of the Group with an example suggested for leading a Depressed Anonymous Group. Also, included in the Manual is a chapter on How to Start a group.

Like most 12 Step programs of recovery they each have their own way of conducting meetings. The 12 Steps and the 12 Traditions of Depressed Anonymous are read at every meeting. Also included in every meeting is the reading of The Statement of Concerns plus How Depressed Anonymous Works.

Most 12 Step groups also have their own “Big Book” which is what the Alcoholics Anonymous program is referred to. In a sense, this is the bible for the fellowship and most members know it by heart chapter and verse. If you want to start a Depressed Anonymous group in your community it is a given that you will want to have a copy of this important book, authored by the early members of the fellowship. In fact, we think it essential to have copies of this book available at each and all meetings. If you are going to be a founder of a local DA group we hope you read this book before you set up your own group meeting. After 30 years working with Depressed Anonymous and helping to set up groups around the world, we have found ourselves continually reflecting on various passages which guide us in our own daily recovery.

You can order Depressed Anonymous Online plus other books written by those of us who WERE depressed. The sale of books provides us with revenue to share hope with others who are in need our support. Please click onto The Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore at depressedanon.com for more information.

We want to hear from you and are looking forward to another group meeting the needs of those “Still suffering from depression.”

Please email us at depanon@netpenny.net. Locate us at www.depressedanon.com.

Was finding this phone number a coincidence?

Helen shares her story about finding help–when she needed it most.

“I finally knew after two year or more of sleepless nights that someone had to help me. I found a card saying Depressed Center, in the back of the phone book. It has a phone number and that was all. I talked to a man on the other end of the phone. I said to myself this man is too busy to talk with me, but anyway I made the first appointment myself. I made myself go. I thank God I did. I thank God that I went for help. It was a whole new beginning for me. I wanted to get well so badly. I think people do have to want to change. I went in with an attitude that I have to get well. I had heard things about counselors that scared me, but this was just all the old negative feelings that caught up with me and boxed me in. I got better and started to think differently. I started to get rid of some of my negative thoughts. I began to feel better and I continued to see my counselor. I started in Depressed Anonymous some weeks later.”


If you are curious about how the mutual aid group changed Helen’s life you’ll need to read her full account in the Personal Stories section of Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition, pages 169-172.

She also has something powerful to say about pleasing people and how she needed to get her priorities straight and begin taking care of herself.

Sources: Seeing is believing: 15 ways to leave the prison of depression. (2017). Hugh Smith. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY.

I’ll do it when I feel better.(2018) Hugh Smith. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY

FREE BEER TOMORROW!

 

How many times have we voiced the  words  “I’m gonna do this” or “I’m gonna do that?”  One  of my favorites is  “I’ll do it when I feel better.” The problem with this statement is that I never feel better.  The problem with all these statements of what we are  going to do are  filled  with   conditions.   Or when I say I’m’ gonna do something , I always find some excuse not to do it.

We  like to put off what we need most. I know that I really need to see a dentist, but I keep putting it off. I mean, who likes pain? Or I know that I need to talk to my sponsor, but I’d much rather just stay in bed and sleep off my sadness. My pillow is my counselor. I know I’m gonna go to a Depressed Anonymous meeting, as I promised my friend, but not tonight.  I’ll tell him I’ll  be there tomorrow, .

The problem here is that “one of these days ” is never today.  We don’t want to live and be responsible for what happens to us today. We want to dwell in a past that we can never get back or the tomorrow which hasn’t come yet.  It’s like the guy who goes into the local pub and he sees  a huge sign on the wall with large red letters, ” FREE BEER TOMORROW!”  “Wow” he thought to himself, “I’ll be back tomorrow .”

Sure enough, here he comes. He goes up to the bartender, points to the sign, and says “I’ll take one of those free beers.”    The bartender smiles and tells him,  “come back tomorrow. ” “But today is tomorrow”  the guy tells the bartender. ” The bartender, puts his  hands on the bar, slowly and emphatically telling  the guy, “That’s tomorrow. Today is not tomorrow!”  The  bartender  gives out with a laugh. The guy walks out of the bar and could be heard repeating  “I get it, I get it.”

I will take care of what needs to be taken care of today–today is all I have.

Today is not tomorrow. Get it?

(c) Hugh(2018)

Thanks to Depressed Anonymous, I am a healer instead of being a victim.

 

“These Twelve Steps work for those who work the program and who try to live one day at a time.  Many times  we have been so scared of being rejected once more and that we have withdrawn deeper into the anguish of our shame and hurt.  We need to air our hurts, our shame, and let others hear our story. There is something healing about hearing ourselves speak to others about our  own journey in life an the many emotional potholes that we have fallen into from time to time. We have felt that our lives were jinxed! But now we can begin  to feel hopeful when other members of the group shake their heads in knowing approval of what we are saying when  we tell our story. Most have been where we are now. And the more we make an effort  to come  to  meetings regularly,  the more  we will find members of the group telling us how they  see a change in the way we talk, act and look.   We will accept the group’s comments as being true and honestly expressed. These people speak our  language  and they  al l   have been where we  are now.  You  gradually begin to see yourself as healer instead of victim the  more  you  work  this program and  get  excited  about  the  possibility  of  helping  others. When you start reaching out to others in the group, it is  at  that  point  that  you  are  carrying the  message of  hope  to  others.  You have  a future with  Depressed Anonymous.”

COPYRIGHT (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Ky. Page 105.

One picture is worth a thousand words!

 

The reason I started a Depressed Anonymous meeting in 1985 is because I knew that getting a meeting organized would be a help to those suffering from depression. I also know  just like in any other 12 step fellowship group,   power is in the group. Whatever the serious nature of the problem we face, a group of people who are on the same page, mentally, spiritually and physically, provides  a healing atmosphere   for the participant.

Since I was also a member of another 12 step fellowship, I instinctively knew that getting the depressed out of their isolation and into relationships with people like themselves would be therapeutic. We all had the same story to tell. It was not only a story of  our struggles with our own depression but it  was a story that brought   a fresh  new hope for ourselves and  for all those with whom we shared out lives.

I mentioned the song sung by Ane Brun, the Norwegian singer,  in a recent blog(10/13) and now today I would like to give you the lyrics to the song. I dedicate it to those   who bring to life something new. We bring a new life not just for ourselves but for others like ourselves. In this case, here is the last stanza of her powerful message.

“It all starts somewhere

It all starts with one

Everything comes from something

It all starts with one

Starts with one.”

Copyright(c) Ane  Brun

(You can hear her whole song on YouTube.)

I have found this song’s  lyrics so powerful that I was motivated to  share a small part of this song with each of you.  As you and I know, ideas and movements have to start somewhere with somebody. They don’t just happen. Movements, great ideas, they   always “start with one, and then two and then three and more. ”  Truly a song about the power of ONE.  We all know about the power of social media and how experiences of others  become viral so that  millions of people may see the same picture and get the same message. As the saying goes, “one  picture is worth a thousand words.”

I remember well the reaction that I got when I asked my Dean of the Psychology Department if I could start a group for persons depressed. I felt that we had possibly found a way out of depression, using the 12 spiritual principles of Alcoholics Anonymous and modeling this program of recovery for persons  depressed, The Dean’s response  was doubtful. He gave me  the  “go ahead”  but remarked that  “since the depressed normally can’t get themselves out of bed because of their depression, don’t be disappointed if they don’t show up for this project.” I’m glad that we went ahead. We  had a very successful outcome where most of the depressed in our program  felt their depressed mood lighten. What happened after that is history. In May of 1985, with the help of members from our initial group, Depressed Anonymous was started. It is now is spreading around the world. Our literature is now in English, Farsi language, Russian, and presently being translated into Spanish (2019) and Dutch. The Internet has brought our message of hope  into lives and  homes around the globe.   Our message  of hope is just a click away.

Remember, it all starts with one, and two, three and more….

Hugh

My moods began to spiral upwards once I regained control of my life!

 

Is it that simple?   Gaining control  of my life  didn’t happen overnight. I did  know that most people’s depression usually lifted after a year’s time. Mine did.  The catch is,  that for me,  it took some work and patience. No magic wand waving over my head and no silver bullet automatically killing the demon of despair that continued to beat me down. But what  gradually happened was  that my mood  came back providing me with hope and a plan for my recovery.  I began to feel some control over how I was feeling and the new mood of cheer gave me the courage to keep on doing what I was doing. In my case, my mood began to be lightened the more I continued my daily walking.

Just my determination to take of myself physically paid huge benefits. For once, in many months I felt some control over my mood and the direction where my life was heading.  I was beginning to be in control instead of my life being out of control and unmanageable.

I remember in Graduate school I gave persons depressed a questionnaire  determining  how  much control they felt they had over their lives. Interestingly, the person who felt they had less control over their lives, or none at all, these  more depressed  persons felt less in control over their environment and the way  the direction of their life was taking.

Those who were less depressed answered that they were begin to feel more in control of their lives. These persons  were experiencing more hope and   the direction of their lives was providing purpose and meaning.

What to do?

First of all, get a plan that will work for you. My plan was this Step by Step program of recovery we call Depressed Anonymous. The best part of the plan is to find friends who, just like ourselves, are working the same plan.  This fellowship, this non judgmental approach and support of the group provides us with our marching orders.  When members of the fellowship share their story–we hear our own story. We know that just by admitting that we need help  it is at this initial starting point, where we begin to spiral upwards instead of continuing   the spiral downward.

If you  want to take control of your life and your mood, it would do you well to join us and  discover how others gained control  over their lives just as it is possible for yourself.

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011). Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Ky.