Category Archives: DA Literature

Depression is different from normal sadness

Depression cannot be reduced to a single factor. It is the result of the coinciding of different factors. Biological, historical, environmental and psychological factors play a certain role in the beginning and its evolution.

Many people never reach a state of clinical depression. Such depression, with the feeling of paralysis that it involves, is different from normal sadness. People with clinical depression, in general, demonstrate physical and psychic alterations; people who are not depressed manifest certain mental signs of sadness.

In addition, people often confuse depression with unhappiness. often one can hear the phrase “I feel depressed’, even though the person concerned only wants to say that he or she is not happy. Until, one has really experienced depression one cannot realize the enormous, difference that exists between being depressed and being unhappy. When we are unhappy, despite the scale of the tragedy that has afflicted us, we remain in contact with reality. When other people offer us consolation and love we can still feel gratitude for their warmth and support. But when we are depressed we feel like people who are excluded from the rest of the world. The comfort and love offered by other people do not penetrate our barrier and we feel neither consoled or loved. To experience real depression means to feel entrapped in pitch or suffocated by some dense, heavy material or buried alive in a dark tunnel. The depressed person is interested in nothing and nobody, and does not feel any hope.”

SOURCE: Jose Saraiva Martins


Comment: If you are a depressed person and are reading this you know the guy who is writing the above material knows what he is talking about. But, if you are a person who has been unhappy but never depressed, it is impossible for you to even begin to fathom what he is talking about. ” Yes”, you might say, “but I don’t see any plaster casts, no sign of physical brokenness and the guy or gal is always happy. You know, the life of the party.”

There is a night and day difference between being depressed and being unhappy. I know, as I have been depressed. I also have been very unhappy as well. Being depressed is a life threatening illness and for many the trajectory can lead to suicide preceded by thinking that is hopeless and suicidal.

The person who has experienced depression themselves and who seeks help to climb out of the dark pit now has friends in the Depressed Anonymous fellowship of the 12 steps. The new person coming into our group soon learns that the members know about the depression experience. Some have talked about trying to commit suicide.

My point is that persons depressed live in a world that they cannot touch, a world which they are viewing from the insides of an enclosed soundproof glass room. They are completely isolated and adrift — floating alone in a river of turbulence and dangerous currents. And when the time comes to flee this pain and isolation they run to the people who say they know what depression is. They also have a “toolkit” which they continue to use in their daily lives which helps them to forever stay out of that glass enclosed room. I am one of those persons who never returned to that past time in my life when I felt totally alone, without friends, purpose or meaning in my life. I owe my life to Depressed Anonymous and its powerful focus on hope instead of hopelessness.

Hugh

“We can’t blame it on our genes, hormones or a chemical imbalance.”

AFFIRMATION

I am taking full responsibility for myself and I am making a commitment to my own health and healing.

“Now that we have learned that we have to take care of ourselves and our recovery that we begin to look at the way we think and feel.  Even though we don’t want to blame ourselves for having been depressed most of our lives, we know now that we are responsible for finding a way out of this depression. We can’t blame it on our genes, hormones or a chemical imbalance.

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

I am aware for the first time since I have been working my program that my thinking is cyclical in that my negative thoughts constantly keep going around and around in circles. I have found that I need to stop the negative self-destructive thinking that has dogged me most of my life. I am able to break the cycle of hurt and my own self-inflicted pain and come to my senses. I do have some good things going for me and I plan to use these good character traits as building blocks for a future filled with hope.

I am learning to take good care of myself. I am more interested in my own self-care than  I am of what others around me want or need.  I am not being selfish as much as I am being concerned about my own growth and development. In the Third Step we declare that  “we made a decision to turn  our wills and our minds over to the care  of God as we understand God.  To be in the care of someone means that they are concerned about us and are burdened with a concern for us.

MEDITATION

“Restore our fortunes, O God, like the torrents in the southern desert that those that sow in tears shall reap rejoicing. Although they go forth weeping, carrying the seed to be sown, they shall come back rejoicing, carrying their sheaves. ” Psalm  126.

SOURCE: Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of Twelve Step fellowships. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Step #2 of Depressed Anonymous

How true. Sometimes when one comes to a 12 Step meeting such as Depressed Anonymous for the first time, and listens to the members stories, we hear  possibly for the first time that there is hope for me too. That is the beauty of attending a meeting where people who are recovering from depression talk about how their lives are getting better and their good days are more frequent. Thanks to the mutual aid group, which for some is their Higher Power, they  soon discover that if others who are/ or were depressed, even suicidal, that they too will have a chance at getting their lives back on track.

Hope is the result of working the Steps.

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. (Personal stories)

To thine own self first be true. Honesty is the best policy

“If I were asked what in my opinion was the most important factor in being successful in the program besides following the Twelve Steps, I would say  honesty. And the most important person to be honest with is yourself…(Bill W., cofounder of AA )

And now back to our Depressed Anonymous Workbook where we continue to clarify our  thinking about the individual Steps and our relationship to them,. We are presently focusing on Step Eleven. (See: The Depressed Anonymous Workbook (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville)

   Step  Eleven  states “Sought  through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understand God, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry it out.”

The following are some questions that you may like to ask yourselves as you continue walking on the path to freedom. In question 12. 9  We are asked  an answer for the following question:  How  has your honesty with yourself made your life more free and more fulfilled with hopeWrite down the areas of your life where you feel your honesty has paid the richest dividends? How has honesty made your life less needful of pleasing others so that  they will like you more?

  Your response here.

12.10 How does our own honesty help us carry the message to others still hurting?

Your response here.

When I run from my fearful feelings I know they have already caught me in their web!

A Higher Thought for Today

” I am going to feel my emotions today and refuse to run when I begin to feel sad and uncomfortable.

Accepting a depression is the opposite of being victimized by it, since it is a choice not to run in panic, not to be frightened into virtual paralysis.  Think of it this way: When we are truly afraid, we can in no way be said to accept our fear; the minute we do, the fright eases. So with depression. When we accept it, the terror lessens.

I used to stuff my feelings when I ran into a situation that frightened me. I also would refuse to experience any emotion that would cause me to feel uncomfortable. I am finding that the more I express myself and share with others the feelings of sadness which seemed to have plagued me since birth, the more I feel cheered and hopeful.  The opposite of fear is faith.  In this program of recovery I need to keep in touch with my Higher Power and keep a daily dialogue going with this Power so that I will continue to grow in hope and health.  Fear keeps depression alive and growing. My faith allows me to risk a life without sadness  even though my inclination is to seek the comfort of the unchanging sadness.”

SOURCE: Copyright(c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 step fellowship groups. (1999) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

PROMISE # 5 of Depressed Anonymous: “No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we see how our experience can benefit others.”

Some of us have attempted suicide. A few of us more than a few times.  We had despaired of ever finding peace or hope.  We believed that we had no future and that our yesterdays were as hopeless as our today’s. It was hard to attend our  first Depressed Anonymous meeting.  We felt horribly alone. We just know that no one in the group has been through what we had been through. But as we listened and watched the older members of the group speak we saw ourselves in their stories.

Personally, I believe that whatever you give out to others is the amount that comes back to you. Our experience can usually help someone else.  As the experience of depression is so isolating, so predictable in its misery  that it is bound to have made such impression upon us that it changed out life and the way we think about our life. And then when our life is changed for the better —thanks to the fellowship of DA, this precious gift  of hope needs to be with those still suffering. Ironically, it appears that the farther we have gone down in mood and up again in our recovery the more powerful can this experience be.

The new members of the our fellowship see the “after” of our lives lived in recovery and so they themselves get involved in our fellowship. The fact that we have recovered so completely is in itself a message of tremendous hope for those who are newcomers to the group. Isn’t it amazing that those who can do the most for those still suffering are those who have worked themselves out of the pit of isolation and begin sharing their story of hope and personal empowerment.”

SOURCE: I’LL DO IT WHEN I FEEL BETTER. (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Pages 39-40.

Promise # 11. “Intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.”

As my mind began to heal and my thoughts became more lucid it became apparent  that something inside of myself was changing. Depression, when you begin to examine the various symptoms up close and deal with them, the experience becomes less threatening. Some say that depression is a collection of behaviors that are brought  into play to defend  us against things that are too painful to face. Also, depression results when a love object is lost through death or that one feels abandoned. We have become so at one with our love object, that we mourn the death of part of us.  The love object and ourselves has become one. I believe we use the word co-dependence today.

At first I was frightened by my various symptoms of depression. The symptoms proved to be baffling. I was not able to get out of bed as well as being unable to concentrate or manage a complex thought.  I began to worry that I was losing my mind and I often asked myself if I was going to survive. But now my ability to handle situations in a meaningful way is due to my  frequent attendance at meetings, and by making a daily time for prayer and meditation and feeling that my life has purpose and meaning.  The more I am physically active  and going to meetings even when I don’t feel like it. Working on my Depressed Anonymous Workbook, reading my Twelve Step literature. The behavior is where my freedom begins. And yes, I do feel lousy at times, but I also know that nothing can stand in my way to make choices in my own behalf. Previous to my involvement with the group I had no idea that depression was not so powerful now as to prevent me from even thinking that I could choose to feel differently.”  (Read more tomorrow on Promise # 11.

SOURCE: Copyright(c) I’LL DO  IT  WHEN I FEEL BETTER.  (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Pages 50-51.

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through

Today, we would like to initiate a series on the Promises of Depressed Anonymous. We will consider some thoughts  about the First Promise of Depressed Anonymous.  The following piece illustrates  some important areas for you, the reader,  to consider.

” Working the 12 Steps is like the person who heads toward the light at the end of the tunnel.  The closer one gets to the light  –the more one discovers the way out.

The light in this case is symbolized by the Fellowship of Depressed Anonymous. The expression of light, health and recovery of its members helps each of us to stay focused on recovery. Work has to be done if we are to find  not only the light  — but a life free from the symptoms of depression. Change is painful.   The first step is really the beginning of the end of our pain.  By admitting that we are in pain is that which paradoxically begins the release of our pain.  This is the paradox of letting go and holding on as we learned from our Step Three. What we hold onto holds onto us.  What we seek –seeks us.

It is difficult for any of us to admit that our lives are out of control.”

–  To be continued

_____________________________________________________________________________________

SOURCES: Copyright (c) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Copyright (c) I’ll do  it when I feel better. (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications,. Louisville.

Copyright (c)  Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

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The risk of being willing to change!

“When you and I begin to work on our life’s journey and start to make this list of people we have resentments against, and begin to forgive them, then this is the beginning of my making things right in our life. You might now be feeling better for the first time in your life as you continue to make a conscious effort to take responsibility for your sadness.  You realize the effort to take responsibility for your sadness.  You realize that you no longer want to stay depressed but instead are willing to risk feeling better (differently). This is taking the risk of being willing to change.

When a person stops smoking there is a residual craving for nicotine, and the craving is most painful for the first weeks after quitting the addiction.  Gradually over time, and due to being able to say no to the impulse to smoke  you feel stronger and so the painful withdrawal becomes less intense.  The same applies to the addiction of depression in that at first it’s sad thoughts, but with time and working our Twelve Steps and our active involvement  with the fellowship of Depressed Anonymous  we have the strength to say no to these sad thoughts and begin to choose hope and serenity instead,.”

Source: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Great Ideas Give Energy Of Purpose And Great Wings To The Soul!

“A great object to awaken resolute choice, must be seen to be within our reach.  The truth, that progress is the very end of our being, must not be received as a tradition, but comprehended and felt as a reality.  Our minds are apt to pine  and starve, by being imprisoned within what we have already attained. . A true faith , looking up to something better, catching  glimpses of distance perfection, prophesying to ourselves improvements proportional to our conscientious labors, gives energy of purpose, gives wings to the soul; and this faith will continually grow, by acquainting ourselves with our own nature, and with the promise of divine help and immortal life which abound in revelation… A great idea…if seized on clearly and vigorously, burns like a living coal in the soul.” –William Ellery Channing

Know what you want,  find out how to get it, and then go get it!

Within each of us is that soul spirit which urges us on to do what we know we must do. So often, almost  by a strange set of circumstances or coincidence we are presented with a person, an idea, or a situation by which we can fulfill the need which we search for.  Do not pass up this prompting, this nudge, but take it upon yourself to investigate and then to take it as your own if it appears to fulfill your need.

Did this fulfilled need just  “happen”  that I ran into an old friend?  Did it just “happen”  that I  picked up a book where my greatest need and solutions were outlined neatly? It was as if they were there all the time.

If you are reading this piece today, and feeling crushed down and alone, could it be that this message for you just didn’t happen but fulfills your own needs for healing and complete recovery from a depressed spirit?

Like all of us who  look for that nudge, that prompting which will push us to make an investment  in ourselves that can last a lifetime, and what I have done, these many years ago, and still use today, is the solution focused Twelve Steps of Depressed Anonymous for my everyday use and continued recovery. Was it the coincidence of a friend giving me a book on depression while I was searching for a way out of my depression  –did it just “happen” or did I see in this coincidence, that something, which had always been in plain sight, and knowing if I pursued this “happening” with vigor and tenacity I could be the serene person that I always wanted to be.

Here are the books that gave me the nudge to fulfill the Promises of the Twelve Steps. These two books, combined in use together are the source of my strength and the “idea”  that fulfilled my need. Follow your nudge! And if you have decided that you are reading this BLOG today, and that it’s message applies to your situation today then take a look at the HOME STUDY KIT and make something great “happen” for your life today!

HOME STUDY KIT (Visit the store)

Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition.(2011)  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville

The Depressed Anonymous Workbook, (201) Depresses Anonymous Publications. Louisville.