Category Archives: The 12 Steps

Acceptance, Fellowship, Higher Power, Hope, The 12 Steps

God doesn’t act like gangbusters.

September 15, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

“In Depressed Anonymous, we are exposed constantly to the tough message that we have to give up our self-pity and sadness if we want to be happy. We have to think in terms of what is possible with God in our lives. Sometimes people come to Depressed Anonymous and don’t want to talk about God and the Twelve Steps, and can’t understand what this has to do with how bad they feel. If after a number of meetings they still don’t want to work the Twelve Steps, we recommend other groups to them. Depressed Anonymous is a spiritual program and it is allowing the Higher Power into our lives that eventually delivers us from the habit of feeling sad and depressed. We in Depressed Anonymous are committed to working the Twelve Steps and listening to each other share how God, as we understand God, has worked in our lives….

Jim, a member of Depressed Anonymous admitted that he had seriously thought of taking his own life as he had lost all hope of removing this sadness which, like a cancer, was taking his life by inches. It was only when he had nothing to lose that he made a decision to turn his mind and his will over to the care of God as he understood God. It was at this point that that the God of his understanding or the Higher Power was allowed to work in Jim’s life. God doesn’t act like gangbusters and force its way into our lives -God has to be invited. Once again there is an invitation from us and we admit our dependence on God instead of on our own addiction. It is then that our feelings begin to come alive and the flow of God’s love makes its way into our lives. We begin to to find that we are feeling better and that something good as we trust, possibly for the first time, this God who will give us our heart’s desire. “God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things that we can and the wisdom to know the difference. ” Trust God to be God, and let this power help you, as it has helped millions of other men an women before you.”

Choice, Fellowship, Focus, Mindfulness, The 12 Steps

If there is one thing that you crave when you are depressed it is certainty

September 1, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

AFFIRMATION

I am willing to live in the imperfect moment and focus on the now, not yesterday’s now or tomorrow’s now.

“So it is if we are to make changes in our lives we must be courageous. Such courage can be found relatively easily in two kinds of situations. When we are certain that the new situation in which we shall find ourselves will bring us every advantage and happiness; when we are certain that the situation we are leaving is totally and absolutely bad.

Thus if the new situation promises perfection, or if the old situation is totally imperfect, we have certainty, and if there is one thing you crave when you are depressed, it is certainty. ” Dorothy Rowe. Breaking the Bonds.

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

My thinking always had been very black and white when I was depressing myself. I know that if I want to continue to live in uncertainty, in time, my depression will also be left behind me in the darkness of yesterday, as I live in the light of today.

The only certainty that I have today is that I want to free myself from the attachment that I have to sadness. I must be willing to risk giving up the certainty that my life will always remain the same. I know that it is only by living with some uncertainty, that my life can be lived with any hope.

MEDITATION

Today, we pray for the courage to remove as much fear from our lives as possible. We pray that God will let us live with the conviction that our lives can be one without fear of people, places, or situations. We believe that once we begin to live without the every present need for certainty in our lives that our fears can be diminished.

(Personal comments: See March 12, 2015 in the Archives of the Blogs.)

SOURCE: Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of Twelve Step fellowship groups. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY. September 1.

Step 02, Step 03, The 12 Steps

The total surprise of living.

August 22, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

I’ve finally found how to live. I guess you could say it was pretty much a round -about- way. Surprisingly, it all came about with my face to face struggle with the dark forces of depression. Included in these waves of darkness appeared the demons of shame, guilt, fear and isolation. All these foes of serenity and happiness entered through the door of my life and settled in. I was imprisoned. It took all my energies to mobilize my will to even get out of bed in the morning.

I reached down deep into my soul and made a commitment to myself and to my wanting to live. I discovered a “power greater than myself” in a belief that told me that I could free myself from this strong attachment to sadness and despair. I moved my body. I began to force myself to get up and walk. Almost like Jesus telling the man paralyzed from birth to get up, take up his mat and walk. And that is what I did. I got out of bed and started walking.

Later I realized that I had put a goal into my life. I had a purpose. It wasn’t some grandiose plan to free myself from the demons of fear–it was a simple action that put meaning in my life. I lived every day with a purpose to survive whatever had me by the throat.

“I came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity.” That was Step Two of the Twelve Steps of Depressed Anonymous. That was the moment I made a decision to trust that the God of my understanding would give me back my life. This is indeed what happened.

As it states in our Manual, ” We found God does not make too hard terms with those who speak seek its guidance. To us, the realm of the spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive, and never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek it. It is open, we believe to all men and women.

We believe that to be conscious is to have been able first of all to listen to someone or something that expresses God’s desire to free us from the misery as soon as we are willing to turn our minds and our wills over to it. Somewhere along the way, we were convinced that that the only safe way to make this life bearable and predictable was to continually sadden ourselves, withdraw into our little shell and make sure that our own small world was completely under our control. It was a perfect little world, this world of ours. It was dark, gloomy and painful, but at least we knew what we had. It is this predictableness that makes life inescapably hell for all of us, even though we’d rather have this than the total surprise of living.”

Scott Peck, in his best selling book, The Road Less Traveled makes the statement in the first sentence of his book “That life is unpredictable.” Yes, life is definitely unpredictable. That is what can make it an adventure of discovery instead of completely removing all spontaneity and joy because of our being imprisoned in that small, painful, and ongoing total isolation of depression.

Break free! Push on! In time you too will live and enjoy the daily adventure of living life. Be surprised by the daily joys of living life!

SOURCES: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY. Pg. 97.

Please VISIT THE DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS PUBLICATIONS BOOKSTORE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

Acceptance, Fellowship, Purpose, The 12 Steps

Setting A Force In Motion

August 6, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

“I personally believe that once I have made the first step, and admitted my powerlessness, I set in motion a force – the loving force of the creator in my personal life. In time I am filled with energy and find that this power can change me – restore my life with purpose and meaning. It can prepare me to meet those who are ready to risk leaving behind the prison of their depression. By my own interest in getting in touch with the Higher Power and getting its direction to “do the next right thing” I find that my own life is gradually more filled with purpose and energy.

There is a saying that to gain energy you must give energy. I have found this to be true for my own life.

What appears to deplete our energy is when our thoughts implode and collide with each other as they are kept focused on the problem. Actually, a person who is depressed is much like a community which is divided and at war with itself.

If you nurture yourself, you will find that just as in the natural world, the growth will be good and the growth will be gradual. There are no quick fixes in life –only slow solutions.

We have a competency, an identity, an autonomy and an interrelatedness to everything alive around us. We are truly a part of every living community on the planet and in the entire universe. We are all one – and the more we see ourselves as part and parcel of this universe, we discover that we are a part of creating a wonderful garden of diversity and plurality where everyone feels a part.

We realize again that by my willingness to live in the will of God that I can live in the peace of my own consciousness of being one with all. What I mean by this is that God acts in and through us the more we let go and let God.

We believe that as we can become aware that God dwells in each of us and demonstrates its power in us the more we remain open to God’s personal presence.

We humans are so grounded in the material and the spatial that it is veritably impossible to be conscious of a Higher Power in and around us. We are so mired in the muck. We can begin to believe that we can tap into this consciousness and let it unfold its plan, its purpose and plot for our life. It will not plan something small and insignificant but will, by small steps, lead us, cause to unfold in our lives that which it has for us to accomplish while we are here on this earth. And I believe the spiritual nature and the fellowship of Depressed Anonymous is what God uses to get us aware and conscious of its love and presence.”

SOURCE: Copyright(c) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Ky. Pages 15-17.

Purpose, The 12 Steps

What happened?

July 28, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

Recollections from the founder of Depressed Anonymous

“There was nothing I could do to shake those horrible and painful feelings. My mind was unable to focus on or to concentrate on anything. My memory was affected and it was impossible to retain anything I tried to read. With each new day, I felt my strength ebbing away. I was physically and emotionally drained. I knew that something was wrong – what was it?

The answer to those question seemed to lie within all the losses that I had acquired over the past months. I had slipped down into the slippery and dark world known only to someone who has ben depressed. I had to do something besides talking to break out of depression. I had to change the way that I had lived my life. First I had to admit that my life was out of control. I was powerless to overcome my symptoms of depression by will power alone. I needed to believe in a power greater than myself. I had to have a spiritual experience. Having been in the ministry for may years, I thought I had a deep spiritual experience, but I seemed to have lost it along the way.

I began to walk five miles a day inside a mall near my home to shake this awful feeling of emptiness that had taken over my life. I set myself this goal to force myself to walk until I starter to feel better. This was about a year following that day in August when I felt myself slipping into the abyss. After doing this exercise of walking day after day, I began to feel a little better. But then the old message came back and said “yes, but this good feeling won’t last.” Then I knew that since I had good days before that depression, I could have a good day again. I went on walking, and within time, I walked my way through the fog that had imprisoned me.

But I had to do the work! Did my symptoms have me imprisoned or did the meaning that I had created in my mind about my life have me imprisoned? I believe it was the meaning I had given to those losses in my life that gradually threw me to the ground, hog tied me, and wouldn’t let me go. I had to believe that somehow my walking gave meaning to the belief that I wasn’t going to let these feelings of helplessness beat me down. I just believed that I was going to beat this thing! I learned a great lesson here in that “motivation follows action.”

SOURCE :Copyright(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (1998, 2008, 2011). Depressed Anonymous Publications, Louisville. KY Pg. 21. (Autobiographical sketch of the founder of Depressed Anonymous, Hugh S., in Evansville, Indiana in 1985.)

Exercise, Hope, Journaling, Mindfulness, The 12 Steps

6 Ways To Help Yourself Through Depression

July 12, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

6 WAYS TO HELP YOURSELF THROUGH DEPRESSION.

Don’t bottle things up. If you’ve recently had some bad news, or a major upset in your life, try to tell people close to you about it and how it feels. It helps to re-live the painful experience several times, to have a good cry, and talk things through. This is the mind’s healing mechanism.
Do something. Get out of doors for some exercise, if only for a long walk. This will help you to keep physically fit, and you may sleep better. This will help you take your mind off those painful feelings which only make you more depressed when allowed to sweep over you.
Eat a good balanced diet, even though you may not feel like eating. Fresh fruit and vegetables are especially recommended. People with severe depression can lose weight and run low on vitamins, which only makes matters worse.
Resist the temptation to drown your sorrows. Alcohol actually depresses mood, so while it may give you immediate relief, this is very a temporary and you may end up more depressed than ever.
Don’t get into a state of not sleeping. Listening to the radio or watching TV (it’s on all night) while you are resting your body will still help, even if you’re not actually asleep, and you may find that you drop off because you’re no longer worrying about not doing so!
Remind yourself that you are suffering from depression–something which many other people have gone through –and that you will eventually come out of it, as they did, even though it does not feel like it at the time. Depression can even be a useful experience, in that some people emerge stronger and better able to cope than before. Situations and relationships may be seen more clearly, and you may now have the strength and wisdom to make important decisions and changes in your life which you were unable to do before.”

SOURCE: Depression. pg. 9. Pamphlet published as a service to the Royal College of Psychiatrists. Reprinted in THE ANTIDEPRESSANT TABLET, Number 1 Number 4.

NOTE: This post was first published as a BLOG in September 30, 2015.

You can click onto the “tools of recovery” listed on the drop down menu at the Depressedanon.com website to discover more helpful tools for recovery from depression.

Depressed Anonymous, Hope, Spirituality, Step 05, The 12 Steps

I have found a new life and a new freedom. Will you join with me?

July 3, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

AFFIRMATION

My freedom today is growing inside of me as I hope for new life, new friends and new opportunities for serenity and peace.

“We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, ever dark cranny of the past. Once we have taken this Step Five, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our creator. We may have had certain spiritual experiences. The feeling that the drink (insert depression) problem has disappeared will often come back strongly. We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.” AA Big Book.

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

“…When I am in the early days of my recovery, it is so natural for me to begin thinking how bad things will be today, or when will I actually begin to feel better? I don’t believe that these good feelings will last. I set myself up for sadness. This type of thinking is similar to the alcoholic who think they can take one drink but continue to drink til they are drunk. For us to think that we can start to bash ourselves with sad thoughts without getting drunk with the numbing effects of sadness is sorely mistaken. This is called denial.

I believe with all my power that even though I walk through the valley of darkness that my God will always be there with me. I believe also that my sadness will not last forever, but that today is all I have and I have hope for my day, today. I know that the more I turn to my Higher Power, the more my Higher Power turns to me.

MEDITATION

God, please don’t let us get attached to anything that isn’t of your making. Our thoughts that we will never feel better are really thoughts that aren’t based on fact as most people admit, since they have both good days and bad days in the future. God, help us to have a good day, today! Help us to be free today!”

Copyright(c) Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups. Hugh Smith. (Depressed Anonymous Publications, Louisville. KY. Pgs 133-134.)

VISIT THE STORE for information on ordering online this work and many others.

Higher Thoughts is now available of KINDLE.

Acceptance, Fellowship, Forgiveness, Step 04, Step 05, The 12 Steps

Cleaning House: Steps 4 & 5

June 29, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

AFFIRMATION

I know that I can be forgiven.

“Our moral inventory had persuaded us that all around forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew we’d be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too.”

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

In Step 5 we really get serious about our life and our thirst for freedom. It is especially evident when we work this step that a new spirit of freedom penetrates the very fiber of our being. I know that it is when I look myself in the face, list and spell out each and every fault/defect that keeps me locked into my prison of depression. I can say with all truth and humility that I am more free now than I have ever felt in my life because of my working the Fourth and Fifth Steps. I am learning that what it takes to be set free from our painful past is the total honesty in speaking about it.

I gain forgiveness by giving it. When I release my anger or revenge toward another human being I am then free.

MEDITATION

God, please release in us our need to hang onto our guilt and anger. Cast your light on our pain and let us find peace. (Personal comments).

SOURCE: (c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of Twelve Step fellowship groups. (1999) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY. pg 129.

To order ONLINE please VISIT THE STORE at this site.

DA Literature, Depressed Anonymous, Depressed Anonymous Workbook, Fellowship, The 12 Steps

I now have the key that unlocks my prison of depression

June 29, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

In the Promises of Depressed Anonymous, we know that they will materialize if we work for them. What kind of work do we need to do?

In the Depressed Anonymous Publication, I’ll do it when I feel better we find that there are a number of healing routes which will lead us out of the prison of our isolation and despair.

First we read our Depressed Anonymous Manual. and apply what we have read in each Step and utilize the Depressed Anonymous Workbook. And of course, we go to as many meetings as possible and apply the 12 step spiritual principles of recovery to our daily life. Also, we get a sponsor, which is a person who is familiar with the Steps and who applies these spiritual principles in their own life. The sponsor and you will meet as often as agreed and he/she will help guide you along the road to recovery. In time and with work you will feel the release and freedom provided by having had a “true spiritual awakening” which can keep you in God’s will. This happens to be God’s plan, so always remember to stick to the plan. Good things begin to happen to us when we live in God’s will. And that’s a PROMISE!

SOURCES: (c) I’ll do it when I feel better. (2017) DAP . Hugh Smith. Louisville. KY. Page 53.

To order ONLINE please go to VISIT THE STORE.

Fellowship, The 12 Steps

Is your soul getting what it wants?

June 25, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

Thanks to (c)Dep-Anon, which is the name of the Depressed Anonymous Family fellowship group, we can find ways to give support to each other whose lives are intertwined with those significant others who are depressed. Our basic text makes use of the 12 Step principles of Recovery just as does Depressed Anonymous, the basic text for those of us who are depressed.

Dep-Anon, with its thoughts of support and with a foundation of 12 Step spiritual principles are written by those persons who have Family members and friends who are depressed. Their experiences speak and carry great weight for those of us who are desirous of learning how to live with understanding and serenity in very trying circumstances.

A psychologist James Hillman stated that “Until the soul gets what it wants, it must fall ill again.”

For what does our soul yearn? Can you tell me? Can you tell me even what is this soul reality. Is it my personality? Is it my character. Is it me? Is it all of me? And then, what is it that your soul yearns? Is there a “hole” in your soul that is continually filling up with sadness and despair? In order to make a difference in our lives, day by day, is to reflect on the Serenity Prayer (below) and make it one’s mantra throughout our day.

“God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

“We treasure our “Serenity Prayer” because it brings new light to us that can dissipate our old and nearly fatal habit of fooling ourselves.

In the radiance of this prayer we see the defeat, rightly accepted, need be no disaster. We now know that we do not have to run away, nor ought we again try to overcome adversity by still another bulldozing power drive that can only push up obstacles before us faster than they can be taken down.” (ABSI. pg.20).

SOURCE: Copyright(c) Dep-Anon Family Group Manual. Pgs.33.

“We can only live now, and so we have to let go of past hurts and past resentments.” Depressed Anonymous. p. 37.

Further reflection points! See website MENU at the drop down Tools of Recovery site and check out The Serenity Prayer and Live in the Present.

Hope is just a few steps away!