What is co-rumination but two people coming together and sharing with each other their own issue with depression.  Obviously, this can be a solution to the problem of trying to figure out the problem in your own head.

In our manual, Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition we can read more about what happens when we do not share our story with another.

“The more you ruminate about how sad you are and then how bad you are for being so sad, the more you have begun  the downward spiral  into physically feeling weak and hopeless.  This is the  time to call a friend or a member of the group(Depressed Anonymous). Just s ay: “Hey, I’m feeling sad and  this is the reason why I think I am feeling sad –and what do you think?”  More times than not, your sad feelings will melt away.” Page 93.

But we need to remember, a co-ruminator will not lead you down the road to more misery, but will continue to share with you the spiritual principles of the Twelve Steps.  There is such a thing as a positive rumination. This form of chewing on what is possible in overcoming our symptoms of depression gradually  leads  you out of the swamp  giving you the necessary tools to continue to live with hope and with positive avenues of living every day with serenity.

Hugh

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For more information on literature from  Depressed Anonymous Publications, click on to the Bookstore.

“Jim, learned that he needed more  “SUNSPOTS” to bask himself in. These “SUNSPOTS”  are meditation times where we can focus on all those pleasurable events, people, places or things that can make us feel happy.  The trouble with most of us is when we are depressed it is that our whole life seems to go  into a deep pit and an eighty foot hole and with an eight foot ladder.

One good way to escape from the prison is to get with a group of people who by joining together each other’s  section of the ladder will eventually get to the top and out of this deep dark hole that we call depression. Think upon these small SUNSPOTS through out the day and know that you are gradually  coming into the light of a new day. Prepare a list of memories which at one time in your life were the cause of some joy and pleasure, and try to recreate that activity in your imagination as often as you can. At first, all you might be able to do is  to just  make a mental decision to do it even though at the time you don’t feel any particular pleasant emotion. Keep at it and with continual encouragement of the group, you will be able to recapture a little joy and peace. You will begin to have more mastery over your life and the world and this in itself can lower your feelings of sadness. When you have a negative image or thought which produces an unpleasant feeling, replace it immediately with three positive and pleasant thoughts or mental images. In DEPRES SED ANONYMOUS we call this THE LAW OF THE THREES.”   One negative thought is immediately replaced by three pleasant thoughts and/ or memories.” Pages 47-48. Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

In the  Personal stories section of DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS (Page 114), a member of the fellowship tells us  how SUNSPOTS helped her face the work of freeing herself from the shackles of depression.

“Look for SUNSPOTS,   memories from the past that were happy times and ones which bring back happy feelings from years gone by. I tried, but none came to mind. But I did find that thinking about the book and what it said did make me feel a little bit better. The piece of a song popped into my mind, “Seek you first the Kingdom of God and His Righteousness and all the others will be added to you. ” “Hey! A SUNSPOT” I   said to myself.

Then I felt a warm glow and then I did feel better–I did it! I made myself feel better. I can undepress myself! I had mixed feelings. I want to feel better, but admitting I depressed myself was not an easy thing t do.

I went back and reread the book, but now with an open mind. I have started to follow the Twelve Steps and with the help of the Higher Power, I can have a brighter future. I am making and putting in my memory a lot of  SUNSPOTS for those times when I am feeling depressed and when I can choose to draw upon when I feel that I need them.

I put up a “stop” sign for all negative thoughts and bring out a SUNSPOT to carry me through.”

-Anonymous. A member of the Depressed Anonymous Fellowship.

NOTE: If you are presently registered as a member of the  ONLINE HOME STUDY program,  please go to your DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS WORKBOOK (Question # 3.7) on page 16 of the WORKBOOK and answer the question for this subject of SUNSPOTS.

“Pretend that you are putting together  a photo album of the happiest moments  of the  most pleasant events of  your  life. Imagine they are still photos and that  you place them  in their  chronological order. When you feel  depressed you will then look through  the album  –one by one – and  you will  have a pleasant feeling take over your mind and heart. Now,  list eight pictures and the subjects that they represent.”

By working on this project, it can not only slow down the process of rumination (as discussed in yesterday’s BLOG). but it will also can distract you from that spiraling negativity that keeps you depressed and obsessing.

May your day be filled with SUNSPOTS

Hugh

I have been quite aware , early on into my depression experience, that I would continually attempt to find out why I was feeling so  alone, depressed and hollow inside. The anxiety that I felt was overwhelming. It was present wherever I would go. I couldn’t shake it.  I later learned that this, ruminating, is a big part of many people’s depression experience. It was definitely my experience. If you are feeling depressed it Is most likely a part of your thinking  life as well. So, let’s check out what others believe rumination is about. We will want to examine how it works and for my own life, the negative thoughts wouldn’t stop coming.  They cycled me down in that vast sea of  darkness and hopelessness. Nothing could keep me from this compulsive and obsession of trying to figure out (ruminate) why I was depressed.

So,  I looked up the definition of ruminating.

 Wikipedia tells us that ” rumination is the focused attention on the symptoms of one’s distress, and on its possible causes and consequences, as opposed to its solutions. Both rumination and worry are associated with anxiety and other negative emotional states; however, its measures have not been unified. In the Response Styles Theory proposed by Nolen-Hoeksema (1998), rumination is defined as the “compulsively focused attention on the symptoms of one’s distress, and on it’s possible causes and consequences, as opposed to its solutions.” Because the Response styles Theory has been empirically supported, this model of rumination is the most widely used conceptualization. Other theories, however, have posed different definitions for rumination. For example, in the Goal Progress Theory, rumination is conceptualized not as a reaction to a mood state, but as a ” response to failure to progress satisfactorily towards a goal.”

Rumination is the obsessive dwelling on negative factors and thoughts such as shame, guilt anger, and worry. Also, rumination can produce a cycling of thinking where we gradually   paralyze ourselves within the framework of hopelessness  and helplessness. Ruminating, we have discovered does not give  us answers nor is it a solution to our unhappiness and addictive thinking. We do not have a respite or that our feelings are changed.

This  can be put more simply:   Wikipedia states that when a person ruminates, he or she aims to answer questions such as:

How do I feel about this event?

How can I change my thoughts and feeling about the event?

How can I prevent disturbing thoughts and feelings in the future?

Wikipedia goes on to state that “The tendency to negatively ruminate is a stable constant over time and serves as a significant risk factor for clinical depression. Not only are habitual ruminators more like to become depressed, but experimental studies have demonstrated that people who are induced to ruminate experience great depressed mood. (Count me in on that. Editor).  There is also  evidence that rumination is linked to general anxiety, ptsd, binge drinking, eating disorders, and self-injurious behavior. ”

Healthy Self-disclosure

”  Although rumnination is generally unhealthy and associated with depression, thinking and talking about one’s feelings can be beneficial under the right conditions. Healthy self-disclosure can reduce stress and rumination when it leads to great insight and understanding about the source of one’s problems. Thus, when people share their feelings with others in the context of supportive relationships, they are likely to experience growth. In contrast , when people repetitively  ruminate and dwell on the same problem without making progress, they are likely to experience depression.  Co-rumination is a process defined as “excessively discussing  personal problems within a dyadic relationship.

(I find that the Depressed Anonymous mutual aid group, plus the sponsorship of another member of the fellowship of Depressed Anonymous can produce a respite and healing  from the negativity thinking which we call depression.  Also, and just as important, positive goals are established within the group fellowship at all  DA meetings.  Goals for recovery are also established with  sponsorship. The relationship with another is not only productive of healing but serves to provide the tools for personal recovery. In other words, by being part of a group  fellowship there is a gradual  breaking apart the cycling and spiraling  downward that keeps us ruminating and depressed.  This is where hope breaks into the circle of hopelessness.

Another important tool to limit the negativity in one’s thinking is to distract oneself, focusing on the solution, through daily journaling about hopeful goals, working on a set program  as discovered in the HOME STUDY PROGRAM, and exercising extra care by being  mindful of one’s surroundings, especially by daily walking in a natural setting. Just to distract oneself from all the negative messages which come automatically to our mind  can be short-circuited by distracting oneself with new pleasant thoughts and thinking. In the Depressed Anonymous manual, (Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition) it speaks of SUNSPOTS– these are those pleasant memories from  our past, which, like photos in our family album. conjure up not only pleasant scenes from our past  but also pleasant feelings are likewise conjured up with those positive  emotions which most often accompany graphic illustrations of a more happier period in our lives.

This program takes one’s own negative feelings and thinking  and begins clarifying one’s thoughts beginning the work of  focusing on solutions and not the problems of shame, guilt and fear. It is a process. According to Pennebaker, quoted in Wikipedia,   “healthy self-disclosure  can reduce stress and rumination when it leads to great insight and understanding  about the source of one’s problems.”

By disrupting one’s negative ruminating by distracting oneself, it is not uncommon that when the fog begins to lift slowly, the first thing   we can think of is the negative thought, “it won’t last.”  I know it happened to me.  Just that thought puts us right back into depression and we feel mentally paralyzed  once again. But, the point here is  to keep on doing those activities, such as go to meetings,  get a guide or sponsor, work the DA Workbook and read positive material on how certain Steps, like we practice in Depressed Anonymous, will gradually give you the freedom you desire. It works for me. And, it will work for you. Do this everyday, and you will find that it works.

Hugh

PS All comments about this article will be appreciated. Tell yourself, ” I am no longer going to be a negative  ruminator!