#3 Promise of Depressed Anonymous, continued

AN EXCERPT FROM THE PROMISES OF DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS. #3/13
* The complete Promises of Depressed Anonymous can be found on page 109 of the Depressed Anonymous Manual. (see Resources).

“When we suppress a negative emotion and refuse to deal with it, consciously or unconsciously, it becomes one of those blocks that form the walls of our personal depression. These unexpressed emotions can fester and boil over so that our energy level is dissipated, scattered. We find ourselves and our will enervated and weakened. We discover that with the internal war raging inside of us we can hardly find the energy to work and/or roll ourselves out of bed a morning. The pain of depression freezes all efforts of mobility.

We discover that our ability to make ourselves do something is now beyond our personal strength and power. We have become helpless. We also discover that we are powerless. Our will power has no control over the depression.

How do we know this particular Promise will come true for me? The only thing that we can rely on is our own experiences. Our experiences tell us that the more we live in the solution of the Promises of Depressed Anonymous the more serenity and peace is ours for the moment.

We have discovered that it is when we begin to live in the solution that our solution focused program begins when we start to reflect consciously on what is happening now at this very moment. I have noticed that it is when I became conscious about what I am feeling – the direct result of my thinking –it is at that moment that I make the conscious decision to bring myself back to the present.”

RESOURCES

Copyright(c) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. Pages 7-8. 3/13.
Copyright(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.

Promise #3 of Depressed Anonymous

The following excerpts are from “The Promises of Depressed Anonymous”
# 3. We do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.

Many of us have lived with guilt, shame and regret from our past. Until we got down to business – that is, taken a fearless moral inventory – did we desire that the god of our understanding help us see what we needed to do to forgive ourselves and get on with our lives.

As the Promises state in so simple a manner, this does not mean that “oh well, we made some mistakes, so let’s just forget about everything that happened in the past – after all it’s in the past.”

We can spend a lot of time wallowing in the self-pity that occupies any addiction. We also might regret all the tine we wasted staring at the blank wall, alone and trying to figure out in the circling of our thoughts the whys of our immobility, passivity and pain.

It is in Steps Four and Five where our past regrets are played out and dealt with. Once we have made a list of all our resentments and fears and spoke of them to a trusted friend you can begin to feel a new sense of freedom. It’s as a huge weight has been lifted from our shoulders.”


The second half of Promise # 3 will be provided tomorrow.


#2. Promise of Depressed Anonymous Continued. “Happiness is an elusive feeling.”

The following is a continuing excerpt from The Promises #2 of 13.

“A pill might make you feel differently 0but it will never take away the circumstances that brought you down in the first place.
The Promises here tell us that we will find a new freedom of happiness -but first work has to be done.
To be happy doesn’t mean that we are to be entirely free from problems and disquieting moments. Since we are all human we experience the pain of discouragement, remorse, anger and other assorted emotions.
Happiness is an elusive feeling -and for each of us happiness can mean something very different when I say to myself “life doesn’t get any better than this,” then I know that life is indeed good and that all is well with my soul.
What can keep us in the prison of depression is the construction that we place on events and situations that occur in the world.
To be free means to act with a degree of spontaneity. This after all is the opposite of depression.
Events of themselves are not the cause of our depression – similar events are in the lives of many folks but there are some folks that don’t experience depression because of them. So, it must be the way we think about these events and the meaning we place on these situations. Our lives and the way we look at life is composed of past and present events.

Our past life is the way we predict the future. “Since bad things happened to me in the past-bad things are bound to happen to me in the future.” How true this is.
Our prison is composed of blocks of times and situations which at one time were fluid – like a flowing river. But since these events affect our sense of self we caused the river to stop flowing and instead our painful thoughts and feelings – are the blocks that make up the walls of our personal prison. We need to restore the fluidity of our lives. Once when our self has been restored – namely our spontaneity, we will experience freedom and happiness. By having that spiritual experience and by being an active member of Depressed Anonymous is what can restore us to sanity. Happiness comes from finding loving support, and acceptance. ”

RESOURCE

(C) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous. (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. Pages 4-7.

#2. But we are going to know a new happiness. Promises of Depressed Anonymous

The following is an excerpt from The Promises of Depressed Anonymous. Page 4.

“Once the Steps begin to play an active role in our lives we begin to feel a shift in how we look at ourselves, our relationships and others. There is that small sprout of hope moving through our minds and spirit. We feel that our involvement in our fellowship group of Depressed Anonymous is a definite plus in how we look at life and our recovery. There is a certain tranquility that was never part of our lives before. Our sadness, pushed us down to the ground day after day. The more we dwell upon how bad we felt, the worse we felt, isolating us that much more.

The new happiness actually happens. We become living hope that in Depressed Anonymous a promise made is a promise delivered. There is no doubt in our minds that there is a Higher Power guiding us through each day of our lives. And to have this power, greater than ourselves, as stated in Step Two telling us that we “came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” No longer do we have to beat ourselves up because we aren’t perfect as others in our lives tried to make us believe. Many of our lives were made miserable by all the expectations that others had for us growing up.

As it says in our Depressed Anonymous manual that we won’t change until we have some assurance that when we do change we will be completely happy. They want to have someone promise them that if they decide to change they will have no more problems and will be happy.

Dorothy Rowe tells us that ” this request is based on two assumptions, namely; 1) They who haven’t got my problems has no problems at all (therefore when my present problems disappear I shall have no problems); 2) Happiness is total certainty (therefore unless I know exactly what is going to happen I cannot be happy).”

To be happy we must seek out and live as God wills. We make a decision.


More on The Promises #2 tomorrow.

Resources

(c) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous,(2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.
(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition(2011). Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY Page 110.
(c) Dorothy Rowe.(1991) Fount Paperbacks Foreword. Great Britain. In Forward to Second Edition of Depressed? Here is a way out! which was published in 1991 by Fount Paperbacks, a division of Harper Collins Publishing Group, Ltd., located in London, England.

Do we believe nothing will ever change? A response from The Promises of Depressed Anonymous. #1

Excerpts from The Promises of Depressed Anonymous (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY.

FOLLOW THE DISCUSSION/COMMENTARY ON THE PROMISES EACH DAY

“I do believe that the pain of our depression originates from inside ourselves. We construct present day reality based on life experiences. The past is the predictor of the future. As it says in Depressed Anonymous, many of us hold the absolute belief that “since bad things happened to us in the past bad things will happen to us in the future. ” In other words – we have made up our minds – nothing will ever change. And of course this belief is what promotes and keeps our depression alive.”

The opposite of depression is spontaneity and vitality. When we are depressed we move about as in a fog. We are stuck. Since we desire everything to remain the same, that is, predictable, we in no way believe that life can be different for us. If we intend to stay stuck, we make the decision, choose to stay in the rut of being lifeless, hapless and hopeless.

As we change old beliefs into new ones we believe that things can change as things begin to change. We will begin to experience hope, light and joy.”

“… life doesn’t have to be lived alone in agony or misery.” (Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011)Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Ky. Page 41.)


NOTE:
Tomorrow our commentary on the Promises continues for Promise #1.

Copyright(c) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Ky. Page 1-3. The 1st Promise of a total of 13 Promises.

How can I recover from depression?

The following is an excerpt from the Promises as presented in The Promises of Depressed Anonymous: Planting a seedbed of Hope. (2002). Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.

# 1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through.

“Working the Twelve Steps is like the person who heads toward the light at the end of the tunnel. The closer one gets to the light – the more one discovers the way out.
The light in this case is symbolized by the fellowship of Depressed Anonymous. The expression of light, health and recovery of its members helps each of us to stay focused on recovery. Work has to be done if we are to find not only the light – but a life free from the symptoms of depression. Change is painful! The 1st step is really the beginning of the end of our pain. By admitting that we are in pain is that which paradoxically begins the release of our pain. This is the paradox of letting go and holding on as we learned from Step Three. What we hold onto holds onto us. What we seek- seeks us.
It is difficult for any of us to admit that our lives are out of control.
People sometimes speak of their depression as a comfort. I can identify with that, because if they were top feel anything else, they might end up in the hole of the doughnut.
The pain of depression begins to dissolve as a result of doing something we have never done before.
It happens to be true that the more we get in touch with and remove our resentments, fear, guilt and self-pity from our lives, the lighter we feel emotionally. The less need we have to rely on our defense mechanisms which shielded our fragile egos from pain, hurt or remorse, the freer we become.”

RESOURCES

COPYRIGHT(C) The Promises of Depressed Anonymous. (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. Pgs. 1-2.
COPYRIGHT (C) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition(2011. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY. Page 109.

Do I value myself?

“I am convinced that when I am depressing myself, that is, talking to myself and telling myself how bad and unacceptable that I am, I probably come across to others in in the same manner. When I try to please people I seem to be more depressed than before. I want to have other’s approval so much because I don’t really have a self that I can approve. It is only when I begin to value myself that other’s may or may not approve of me. When I begin to look on myself more positively, it will be alright with me, if someone disapproves of me.
The more I value myself, my word, and my future, the more my depression is gradually diminished. ”

Resource

(c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 step fellowship groups. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. October 20. page 172.

I Was Accepted

Have you ever went to a meeting where for you it was the first time. It could be a little scary –I know that it was for me.

In our group manual, Depressed Anonymous, I would like to share with you his feelings on going to his first Depressed Anonymous meeting.

Here is what he shares with us in the Personal Stories section of Depressed Anonymous(Page 133).
“So what is the power of Depressed Anonymous? For me, it’s just like attending the first meeting. I was a little scared and apprehensive at first but then I found the Depressed Anonymous meeting was a place to go where there were other depressed people just like me. They could relate to and understand what I was going through. They didn’t judge me or think of me as crazy. I was accepted.”

When he entered through the door of the Depressed Anonymous meeting it opened a new way of living for him. It changed his life. He found hope. He found that he was accepted by total strangers. The miracle of the group was that he was able to feel at home. He was given a recovery program for his everyday life.

The wise Rabbi Nachman shares with us the truth, “All new beginnings require that you unlock a new door.”

And the key which unlocks the door is a belief that just possibly I can get better. Ray tells us how he was somewhat scared, he pushed on, entered into a group where he was not only accepted but one where he found hope and an ever accepting fellowship.

RESOURCE

(C) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY P.133).

Hope is just a few steps away!