Category Archives: Helpful Thinking

12 Step Meeting, DA Literature, Depressed Anonymous, Depressed Anonymous Workbook, Fellowship, Focus, Mindfulness, Purpose, The 12 Steps

In getting my priorities straight, my depression got better

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CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

On this New Year’s Day, I find that my work for my life today is to reflect on a happy period of my life  where I have experienced   happiness and contentment.  If I can’t remember such a time,  then  I will construct a situation of contentment in my mind  and just imagine it happening right now.

In my relationship to God, I am beginning to realize that it isn’t so much that I don’t believe that I’ll ever feel better, but that I just  can’t know for sure. My first  priority is to admit that I do have a problem and that with God’s help I can get through my depression.

As soon as I give up my victim stance and begin to take responsibility for my feelings and my life, I can start to work as if my recovery is really up to me and that I will in time, succeed in getting out of this deep dark hole that I call depression. My priority  is to begin each day with the conviction that the Twelve Steps will be an aid in getting out of my depression. I know and believe without a doubt that WE have a solution for depression!

MEDITATION

God, we seek your guidance and your strength for our lives. Whatever we have lost or feel we have lost, please heal the holes in our soul and fill  it with your love and peace. In our quiet time today, show us what part of us needs to be healed.”

HAVE A NEW YEAR FILLED WITH PEACE !

VISIT THE STORE TODAY AND DISCOVER THE TOOLS THAT WILL BE THE PATHWAY TO YOUR OWN RECOVERY, DAY AFTER DAY.

An excellent tool that is highly recommended for the Depressed Anonymous  group use or individual study is the HOME STUDY KIT which is composed of Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) and The Depressed Anonymous Workbook (2002) both published by Depressed Anonymous Publications. These two books give a complete listing of the Twelve Steps and a commentary for each Step. The Workbook provides a coordinated listing of Steps with its appropriate questions related to each Step in the Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition.

The Promises

Mindfulness, serenity and the present

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Let’s start with the power called The Present. This reality is like the sun, shining  its light on what lies before us in perfect illumination. This is our guide  as we proceed on the path of life. This  light illuminates our mind and where we stand right now. The Present takes in all that we are, where we are and how we are.  If you traverse outside its boundaries, mostly in the yesterdays and the tomorrows of your life then there may be problems.  If you do spend more and more  time in what was and what might be, then the illumination casts its bright light away from the NOW and into a path not yet taken.  All I have is the Present and the NOW. Today is all that I have and the 24 hours that make up this light and darkness of my daily life.

Mindfulness means the awareness with how we live out our lives in this 24 hour time period. To be mindful is to be aware and conscious of all our surroundings, both those  inner and external realities that make up our world. Mindfulness also relates  powerfully to how we talk to ourselves in the Present and in the NOW. Are we aware of our feelings that break through and into our immediate consciousness? What do these many feelings, pleasant and unpleasant tell us about ourselves? Are these feelings fearful? Or are these feelings filled with peace and hope for ourselves in the NOW and in  The Present? And for a time, have we denied these feelings of darkness and despair and managed  to blunt them, numb them with mind altering substances, with numbing thoughts that keep us in the dark?  Is there a way out of this powerlessness? Yes. Simply stated.

Speaking for myself and the many, many folks who now are mindful of another way of thinking about their selves and what is going on in and around them have experienced this  bright light. A path is revealed. All of us who have been in the darkness are finding hope, serenity and the stepping stones to help us to continually  walk with hope. We are mindful  NOW of how to live in the Present and how to gradually walk this wide road with so  many other mindful travelers. Because we have been willing to see where this light leads us, we NOW know that healing is ours and that we are never alone. We have risked living in the light –refused to live in the darkness of the past and march on today using as our guide the Twelve Steps of recovery. I am now mindful of a Power greater than myself. Because I came to believe in a power greater than myself (finally- tired of living in the hell of despair)  I “surrendered”  and made a “decision to turn  my  life and will over to the god of my understanding.”

So, in order to be free of unconscious living I am always mindful (at least I try to be) of the work to be done that lies right in front of me. I’m sticking to the plan.

I  am mindful of all the “red flags” that warn me of potential dangers that could throw me back into those life threatening days of depression. I am mindful that when my mind turns to resentments, self-pity, hopelessness, hostility toward others,  and negative thinking and isolating behaviors, that I need to get back into the bright light of hope, serenity, prayer,  a daily meditation(Higher Thoughts for Down days)  and the Fellowship of our mutual help support group, Depressed Anonymous. I also talk with a group member of the fellowship whom we call a sponsor.

All of what I have written above can produce what all of us are yearning for, namely, that peace that rests the mind and relaxes the body. Serenity is what we want. We want to leave the mess of our lives, get a grip on  how to change it, and choose to live with hope. Oh, there will be problems, as always, but now we have the mindfulness, to recognize where  lies the hope and  the freedom for living…in the NOW, with Mindfulness!

Do you want to live in the Present, in the NOW, with mindfulness and serenity?  Please think about doing what I have done and as has countless others, to be a part of this great human fellowship bound together by our living out the Promises of the Twelve Steps.

I hope to meet you along this path someday. Please join us!

Hugh

SOURCE: Copyright (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011).  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

VISIT THE  STORE : Check out the literature for more help on how to be part of this fellowship.

12 Step Meeting, Choice, Depressed Anonymous, Focus, Higher Power, Higher Thoughts for Down Days, Mindfulness, Mutual Aid

I believe that misery is an option

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“If surrender of our wills to the ‘care of God’ is of the essence of the spiritual life, for anyone who truly desires to free themselves from a chronic and compulsive behavior such as depression, then the Twelve Steps can be your stepping stones to the path of a hope filled life.”

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

I used to hear the word “surrender” as it made me feel like I was in the hands and under the total domination of another.  It was like I had no control whatsoever as to what I was to do or what I was to be. I was blind to the fact that in reality I had already surrendered my life to my sadness so that whenever I wanted to hide, or isolate myself, I just saddened myself and  so didn’t have to feel anything. I am surrendering to the God of my understanding;  slowly my life is filling with light and hope and this is what I really want for myself. I am finding that the ‘care of God’ is much better than anything I could ever  wished for.  My life is one filled with hope rather than being hopeless.

The spiritual life for me is filled with the excitement of knowing that  this God of mine, as I understand him, is  today wanting to lead me further into the light of his healing power. My spiritual life is filled  now with a close and personal relationship with a God who loves and guides me on a minute-to-minute basis.

MEDITATION

We are going to get as close to God today as we choose to get.

SOURCE:  Copyright (c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups.  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Pages 257-258. December 29.

Acceptance, Compulsion

Spirituality requires risk

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Alcoholism (depression) and addiction , characterized as they are by the rigid clinging of obsession and compulsion, help us to understand the experience of release. Perhaps the greatest paradox in the story of spirituality is the mystical insight that we are able to experience release only if we let ourselves go. This is the paradox of surrender. Surrender begins with the acceptance that we are not in control of the matter at hand –in fact, we are not in absolute control of anything. Thus the experience of surrender involves the “letting in” of reality that becomes possible only when we are ready to “let go” of our illusions and pretensions (our unreality).

If surrender is the act of “letting go” the experience of conversion can be understood as the hinge on which the act swings – it is the turning point, the turning from “denial” as a way of seeing things to acceptance of the reality revealed in surrender. The self-centeredness that reflects a false relationship with reality, and that false relationship begins with distorted seeing, with some kind of false understanding about the nature of reality and our relationship with it. Breaking through that denial and confronting reality is what members of Alcoholics Anonymous and Depressed Anonymous mean by “hitting bottom.”

The experience or release most frequently comes at the point of exhaustion, at the moment when we “give up” our efforts to just be…

What blocks release more than anything else is the refusal to “let go” that comes from the demand for security, for certainty, for assured results. Release, like spirituality, requires risk.”

SOURCE: The Spirituality of Imperfection. (1992) Ernest Kurtz and Katherine Ketchum. Bantam, NY. , Page 173.

12 Step Meeting, Miracle Thinking

How Depressed Anonymous Works

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This  following is read at each and every meeting of Depressed Anonymous.

“You are about to witness the miracle of the group. You are joining a group of people who are on a journey of  hope  and who mutually care for each other.  You will hear how hope, light and energy have been regained by those who were hopeless and in a  black hole and tired of living.

By our involvement in the group, we are feeling that there is hope – there is a chance for me too – I can get better. But we are not the  people with the magic pills and the easy formula for success. We believe that to get out of the prison of depression takes time and work.

We all have been wounded in different degrees by the experience of depression. We also know that there is a method to regain control over our lives that is practical and workable.  It is successful for all those who want to change their lives. Some of us believed that there was no hope and that suicide was the only way out.

In this natural world, one of the first laws is that all growth is gradual – that belief is the bottom line for all of us who are depressed and who want to get better.  The more we attend meetings, the more we will learn and see the various ways to escape from depression. We also learn how important it is not to give up on ourselves.”

SOURCE:   Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

12 Step Meeting, Belief

Depression dies in the light of discussion

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One of the 15 Statements of Belief in  Believing is Seeing : 15 ways to leave the prison of depression, tells us  in Statement # 9 that ” Withdrawing from friends and other social contacts is the first clue that you are slipping back into the isolation and pain of depression. Move toward a friend, get a sponsor and  go to a 12 Step  meeting. Ask your Higher Power for that nudge that can guide you onto the appropriate path.”

There are two times that we need to go to a meeting. One, when we don’t want to go to a meeting and secondly when we want to go to a meeting. From my own personal experience I can share with you that it’s when I go to my meetings that I am always able to come away from  it with something positive to think about.  I can always say that I feel better after a DA meeting. I know in my heart that when I just want to sit at home by myself and ruminate within my own head all the horrible things that have happened to me, are about to happen to me and are happening to me now, the more I find that I depress myself.

It’s our addictive thinking, our compulsive way of processing negative information,  which means that we habitually store the negative and dump the positive inflow of information and that gets us wanting to fall back into the old habit of staying isolated and avoiding others. We might fool ourselves and say that people have nothing to offer me so that I distance myself from everyone. Part of my nature when depressed is to avoid and distance myself from whatever I feel is threatening, like a child afraid of the dark.

I can only do what God wants me to do and I find out what this is by spending time alone with my God in meditation.  Whatever we do, we need to know that our isolation and our withdrawing from friends and family, is an environment by which our depression can grow strong. Depression dies in the light of discussion.

SOURCES:

Copyright (c)Believing is seeing: 15 ways to leave the prison of depression. (2015) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Copyright (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications, L0uisville.

Copyright (c)Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step Fellowship groups. ( 1999) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

 VISIT THE STORE FOR MORE LITERATURE.

12 Step Meeting, Fellowship, Kindness, Miracle Thinking

We are not the people with the magic pills and the easy formula for success

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The following instruction, How Depressed Anonymous Works, is read at every Depressed Anonymous meeting.

“You are about to witness the miracle of the group. You are joining a group of people who are on a journey of hope and who mutually care for each other. You will hear how hope, light and energy have been regained by those who were hopeless and in a  black hole and tired of living.

By our involvement in the group we are feeling that there is hope – there is a chance for me too – I can get better. But we are not the people with the magic pills and the easy formula for success. We believe that to get  out of depression takes time and work.”

And so at each and every Depressed Anonymous meeting the group listens as we hear what it will take to escape from the prison of depression.

Also at every meeting of the fellowship we hear how by using the spiritual tools, our Twelve Steps, we can gradually find the path that will and can lead us out into the light of freedom.”

SOURCES:  Copyright(c) I’ll do it when I feel better. (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

The following  books listed below indicate the “toolbox” by  which  one can find the path that leads  out of depression.

Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Depressed Anonymous Workbook (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

VISIT THE STORE for more information on available literature.

Anger, Belief

The human experience of depression

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“It is my belief that the experience  that we call human depression, can very much be like the early designation of alcoholism as partly an allergy as well as being a mental obsession. And depression is very much like alcoholism, in that it very much causes the sufferer much the same symptoms, namely, feelings of being isolated, lonely, angry and  in a   deep dark pit, hopeless and helpless. Also, the depressed who decides to become more isolated and alone likewise digs a hole just a little more deeply. The fellowship of the program is combined with a belief that a power greater than oneself is ultimately what is going to save the person depressed from killing themselves  or floundering in a morass of self-will, resentments and self-pity. Many depressed basically are afraid of people and so tend not to trust others. They also hold a negative view of themselves and think themselves unacceptable to others and to themselves. (P.3)

In primitive human kind there was a system in one’s physical makeup that helped a primitive relative of ours flee or fight when danger approached.  In those days the person faced with a mortal danger got the adrenaline flowing that enabled the pursued to evade his/her captor. It also gave the pursued victim  the energy  to fight and overcome the adversary. In today’s world the days of being pursued by some ferocious tiger or beast is not our problem. But we are still pursued and the fear of the consequences of being caught by whatever is pursuing us  shoots the chemicals  into  our blood stream just as it did in our ancestors – with one major difference — our fears, anxieties, continual worries keep pumping those juices through our system until we are too tired to flee or even to fight. However it happens, the result is that our bodies suffer the damage of the stress of continual unpleasant emotions and feelings coursing through our veins.  We are at war with ourselves and depression is the last wall of defense in which the body says I need to take a rest from all this stress and so I surrender. I am closing down. I don’t want to fight any longer. And when one begins to feel a little better and the energy of one’s spirit starts to flow back into us again and we start  to feel renewed and it is here that our old ghost of fear starts to feel renewed and it is here that our old ghost of fear starts speaking to us saying “Hey, don’t trust this feeling of beginning to feel better. Stay with what you have — at least it’s predictable. At least you know what you have. Don’t try to change anything as you might get something far worse than what you have now.”  (P.5).

SOURCE:   Depressed Once -Not Twice: The  autobiography of a spiritual journey out of depression.  (2000) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. (Pages 3, 5).

Comment:  In this important work, the founder of Depressed Anonymous the author shows us that even in the midst of the pain, isolation and a mental paralysis of will, the 12 Steps provide a plan,, a program of recovery. The author shows how by using the Steps himself in overcoming his own experience of depression that these same Steps  can now be used by those “still suffering from depression.

Affirmations, Depressed Anonymous, Fellowship, Focus, Higher Power, Higher Thoughts for Down Days

I am responsible for me!

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Higher Thoughts for Down Days

I am responsible for me!

“Responsibility is the name of the game in recovery… people who want to change begin to swallow their pride and ask for help.”

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

The ability to respond to the truth of the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous comes particularly forceful when we have hit bottom in our lives and there seems to be no way out of what troubles us. This is where I begin to take responsibility for myself and ask others for help. Who is the best person to ask for help when you are depressed? Obviously, it’s that person who ha been where you are now. I believe that one of the biggest assets of being a member of Depressed Anonymous is the fact that so many people begin to live with happiness, peace, and hope after they have given up control of their lives to the Higher Power.  They indeed have hit bottom and there is no way for them  but up.

To say that my life is out of control is usually hard for any of us to have to admit. The pride that said that I had to please everyone to be happy, or in order to get other’s approval, had to do everything perfect, has resulted  in my depressing myself until I can hardly stand it. Now that I am telling it like it is and I begin to accept myself as I am and refuse to  let other’s opinions of myself overwhelm or dictate life to me, I begin to feel better.

MEDITATION

God, put your love into our hearts and your guidance into our minds as we struggle, day after day, to live with the understanding that we can only do your will by beginning to be responsible for ourselves.

SOURCE: Copyright(c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for 12 Step Fellowship groups. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Page 244.

Acceptance, Fellowship, Purpose, Shame

Depression is the greatest misery…

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Depression is the greatest misery, for in it we’re alone in a  prison from which there seems to be no escape. When we have a physical illness, no matter how great our pain, at times we can separate ourselves from our suffering and feel close to other people, sharing a joke, feeling loved and comforted. But when we’re in the prison of depression, and there is always a barrier between ourselves and other people.

People who are depressed describe this prison in many different pictures: “I am at the bottom of a black pit.”  “I’m locked in a dungeon and they’ve  thrown away the key.”  “I’m inside a black balloon and as much as I struggle, I can’t escape.” “I’m  alone in an icy desert.”   “I’m totally alone, and a great black bird is  on my shoulders, weighing me down.”  The pictures are many and various, but the meaning is always the same. The person is alone in a prison.

Even worse, inside the prison of  depression, we  turn against ourselves in self-hatred. We torture ourselves with guilt, shame, fear and anger. We tell ourselves that we shall never escape from the prison, and indeed, in some way, we do not want to leave the prison. It is torture. It is safety.

The prison of depression is torture because it is isolation, the one form of torture which as all tortured know,  will break even the strongest person.  But it is safety because the walls of the prison shut out most of the things which threaten to overwhelm us and cause our very self to shatter and disappear.”

SOURCE:  Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011). Depressed Anonymous Publications. ( Foreword by Dorothy Rowe, Ph.D., Page 11.)