Category Archives: Supportive Actions

Mutual aid as integral part of the 12 Step recovery program

 

The other day I was taking my grandchildren to a children’s amusement center here at home. My oldest grandchild ( 13 years) has an IPhone with a GPS(Global Positioning System) integrated with his phone. So, as we were traveling along on our way to our destination, he points out to me that his GPS indicated we were going the  wrong way. Alas, I turned off the road,  turned the car around and headed in the direction of the children’s amusement center-just as the GPS directed me.

Not too long ago I came in contact with a captivating and insightful work by a Russian author who  described how everything in the natural world, human, animal and  plant life is able to survive because of mutuality among its  species. As many  believe, it is only by the  survival of the fittest that ensures ones survival in the natural world. It is this fact, according to Darwin, which  makes  it possible for its members to survive the struggle between individual members for the means of existence.

Peter  Kropotkin, who was a Russian Prince and an anarchist had these  important words to share about his belief in mutual aid among all species. In the foreword to his work on Mutual Aid the editor tells us how Kropotkin

 drew on his experiences in scientific expeditions in Siberia to illustrate the phenomenon of cooperation. After examining the evidence of cooperation in nonhuman animals, “savages,” “barbarians,” in medieval cities, and in modern times, he concludes that cooperation and mutual aid are as important in the evolution of the species as competition and mutual strife, if more so.

It was in reading this masterful work, Mutual aid: A Factor of Evolution, which was written over a 100 years ago, and all  based on scientific observations in  the real world that Professor Kessler, the  a well known Russian zoologist, in an address  (1880)  to Russian naturalists who is said to have understood the full importance of Mutual Aid as a  law of Nature. The following is part of  that lecture:

I obviously do not deny the struggle for existence, but I maintain that the progressive development of the animal kingdom, and especially of mankind, is favored much more by mutual support than by mutual struggle…All organic beings have two essential needs: that of nutrition, and that of propagating the species. The former brings them to a struggle and to mutual extermination, while the needs of maintaining the species bring them to approach one another and to support one another.  But I am inclined to think that in the evolution of the organic world  — in the progressive modification of organic beings –mutual support among individuals plays a much more important part than their mutual struggle.

I have written all this today just to arouse  the reader’s interest in the power of mutual aid to form viable, supportive   communities–while struggle for survival works against itself and  community formation with self serving individual concerns,  which may lead to more divisiveness and fragmentation in established societies and communities.

In our day,  the “selfies”  mentality mirrors a trend in our societies where the individual now stands like a nomad  in a desert, without  reference points to  past societal traditions which gave value and meaning to one’s life.  Familial breakdown, loss of traditional religious beliefs, migration, poverty and the disappearance of tribal and national customs gradually erase connections between peoples that were formerly in place  providing  support and a sense of security and trust  for the life of the individual and the  community where they lived. 

This leads us to a brief discussion on the importance of the  establishment of mutual aid groups, support groups in our society today.  Mutual aid group members are an integral part of a community where there is fellowship, support and mutuality. When   one member suffers, all members suffer with them and support them. No one suffers alone. No one is an isolated individual who swims alone in today’s  modern cultures of individual competition and struggle.

Amazing as it is, the 12 Steps have brought to us a way out of our isolation and a way into a supportive community and mutuality. Truly, these groups  promote the belief that everyone is equal in the fellowship — mutuality lived out in the real world–and all members of the group come together to serve each other with hope. The mutual aid given to each other in the group provides a dynamic positioning of one’s life so as to  live life with each other with hope and love. One has  a concern for the welfare of all just  as one’s own welfare becomes the concern of all.

Hugh

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SOURCE: Mutual Aid: A factor of evolution. Peter Kropotkin. (1902, 2008) Forgotten Books. Org.

 

Happiness is a side product of helping others

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT
I always wondered –how can I possibly bring peace to others when I feel so low and down in the mouth? It is my wish to help others who are still suffering and living without the hope of ever feeling better. It is by doing what I have to do every day and living today for all its worth, that I will be able to stay in the now and try to change my moods as they start their usual spiral downward. I believe that ‘Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.’ Thus, I can help others.

Happiness is the side product of my letting go of my self and thinking of some larger effort or goal in my life. It is in setting a goal to work on my self just for today, that I get in contact with my Higher Power and listen to his promptings. I am happiest when I am able to live with hope that possibly, just possibly, my life has a purpose and a meaning.”

MEDITATION
We ask God to point out to us where our areas of self-will lie so that they might be brought to light. We can work on them and get rid of them as these areas block us from our serenity and growth in happiness. We again want to turn our lives and our wills over to you God.


SOURCE: Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups. (1993,1999, 2016).Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

For those who never experienced love growing up

“Depressed Anonymous provides a secure base (love and acceptance) for those who never experienced love or support while growing up.”

After ten years of repeated meetings with the depressed of Depressed Anonymous meetings, it’s clear that the meetings create a secure base for those who in their childhood had neither kindness nor the life giving warmth and affection of family life.

People who keep coming back to Depressed Anonynmous continue to grow and become aware of the inner change taking place week after week as they find not only attention to their story, but find that they are loved and cared for at the same time. Possibly for the first time, they find that they look forward to each weekly meeting and become attached to the positive feelings that emerge inside themselves as they continue to share the story of their pain . In time, they share how their week is suddenly being filled with more good days than bad. It also becomes obvious to the participant that childhood behavior and experiences are carried right on into adult life. Trusting is such a hazard for the depressed because every person is different. You can’t trust your environment because it could suddenly shift and you would be without a certainty that you were bad and worthless. The meetings gradually present to you an opportunity to be someone worthwhile and valued. Your sharing and risking information about yourself begins the construction of a new and secure you. The Depressed Anonymous group becomes for possibly the first time in your life, a very secure and stable enviornmment where you can share, trust and grow.

RESOURCE: Depressed Anonynmous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Personal Stories. Pages 139-140.

Our basic antidote for fear is a spiritual awakening!

Antidote: “A remedy to counteract a poison.” This is the definition as given by Webster’s dictionary. Fear is truly a poison in some ways and in others it is a gift. We need to fear only that which will keep us locked in the prison of depression. Sometimes our fears are of what tomorrow might bring or might be the fears from the past. One of the better antidotes to fear is trying to live, just for today. Today is all I have.

So often I hear others say that they have been depressed all their lives until – let me repeat- until they hear other stories as to how with work, time and belief in a power greater than  themselves that they did and are feeling better now.  I need to trust that once I have made my conscious decision to turn my life and will over to the care of God as I understand him, that my life will indeed begin to change.

“I am no longer alone in my suffering depression. I believe that by getting more active in my recovery that my life will begin to brighten up.”

“We of (AA) and  Depressed Anonymous find that our basic antidote for fear is a spiritual awakening.” Bill W.

SOURCES:
Copyright (c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups. Depressed  Anonymous Publications. Louisville. May  10. Page 95.
Copyright (c) Believing is seeing: 15 ways to leave the prison of depression. (2015 ) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.
Copyright (c) I’ll do it when I feel better. (2013) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

I realized that I was addicted to the self

“As a person that has suffered depression since childhood, I can say that until you start to open up, share your hurts and feelings, listen to the members of the group, watch them as they grow from the support of the group, you will not be able to get out of the prison of your depression. I have been going to Depressed Anonymous for four years and only until recently have I realized that I was addicted to the self.  Only then did I start to take a good look at myself and start to ask God for his help and truly mean it. I am learning to trust in God  and do His will and not mine. I feel better about myself. I can tell you it is a lot easier to be depressed than it is to work on yourself and admit to yourself that there is a problem. It is God’s will for us to live each day to the fullest because of our time on earth is limited. Live each day, not yesterday or tomorrow. Share with the group and your friends and you will be surprised who will be glad to listen  if you would give them a chance. Accept the fact that all of us at Depressed Anonymous are here to listen to you and not make judgments  on you or give advice. Even if you don’t want to share, come to the meetings because you can always get something out of them. Eventually, you will want to share and the group will listen.

In conclusion, trust in your Higher Power – God as you understand God. Support groups are the  way out of our addictions. We may have given  up on God, but God hasn’t  given up on us. Start your day out by asking God: God I pray for the knowledge of your will and the power to carry it out. ”

-Starr writing about her experience with depression and the healing support that she receives in the Depressed Anonymous 12 Step mutual aid group.

Read Starr’s whole story in Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. (Personal Stories section/Pages 129-130 ).

We need to tell our story

“Newcomers also remind us of ourselves when we stepped into the group for the first time. They struggle to keep back tears and hurt as they speak possibly for the first time trusting that they are with people who have been where they are.  This  is what provides the beginning of hope and healing. People of the group speak their language of hope and possibility. They hear how recovery is possible. They want these tools to use in their own recovery. We need also to air our hurts…and let others hear our story.”

We have less concern about self and gain interest  in others“.  THE SEVENTH PROMISE OF DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS.

Copyright (c) I’LL DO IT WHEN I FEEL BETTER. (2014)  Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Page 43.

A foundation for living

“In praying, we ask simply that throughout the day God place in us the best understanding of his will that we can have for that day, and that we be given the grace by which we may carry it out.

There is a direct linkage among self-examination, meditation and prayer. Taken separately, these practices can bring much relief and benefit. But when they are logically related and interwoven, the result is an unshakeable foundation in life.”

SOURCE: Copyright(c) I’ll do it when I feel better. (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Page 102., quoting Bill W., co-founder of AA.

Clarification of thought through journaling

AN AFFIRMATION

I see myself better when I write  down who I feel I am today.

” The simple act of writing something down is tremendously helpful, because to do so we have to bring something clearly to mind. Instead of having half-formed thoughts and confused emotions crashing and  fumbling around inside of us, we crystallize these thoughts and feelings into sentences. Once we put these sentences down on paper we have taken something from inside and put it outside.  Now we can look at it, judge it, and master it.”

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

I am making every effort to get in  touch with who I am and I am taking the opportunity now to focus on what gets me down and what keeps me up. I am seeing, too, that the more I associate with people like myself who are following and working their program of recovery, the better I feel. I intend to journal or keep a diary of my good progress.

I know that the more I stay in my head the greater the confusion. It is only when I begin to see on paper my expressions of hope and confusion that I can begin to change some of my thoughts  which I find I am repeating to myself, day after day. I now can write down a new positive thought about myself. I can choose to feel whatever I choose.

MEDITATION

Our guiding love, our God as we understand God, is doing for us all that it desires to lavish on us today. I am hopeful that I can find my new path and grow stronger in learning the various ways to hear our Higher Power’s promptings.

 

SOURCE:  Copyright(c)  Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily  thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups.(1993, 1999). Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.  April 19th, pages 78-79.

Spirituality spurs recovery from depression!

From: The National Institute for Healthcare Research., as quoted in the quarterly The Antidepressant Tablet, Volume 10.Number 2.

“A recent study in the American Journal of Psychiatry identified this often overlooked resource patients draw upon to help fend off depression–a deep religious commitment – that significantly reduced recovery times. Thus study focused on 85 patients hospitalized with serious medical illnesses who also became depressed. Among their battery  of tests, patients took the Hoge Intrinsic Religiousness  Scale which measures how deeply a person has internalized their religious values and faith.

Surprisingly, patients recovered from their depression 70 % faster for every 10 point increase on the Hoge Scale, which ranged from 10 to 50. This link held even when taking into account other factors that could speed up recovery including physical health…”

 

Comment

No surprise  here. I have  always believed that one’s belief in something or someone bigger than themselves has a powerful influence on  the outcome of  whatever one hopes for. And in this case,  I have personally  discovered how the 12 Step spiritual principles of recovery have helped me find a way out of my depression. It was the key that unlocked the prison door that held  me captive.

For more information on this subject please see  some of the following resources which will be helpful for your own recovery.

  1. (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.
  2.  (c) Believing  is seeing: 15 ways to leave the  prison of depression. (2015) Depressed  Anonymous Publications.

3.   (c)  Depressed Once-Not Twice: The spiritual autobiographical  journey of the Founder of Depressed Anonymous out of depression. (2002)

And for more resources please VISIT THE STORE here at www.depressedanon.com